2021 and done
I would love to think Betty White died today at 99 just to make People look stupid.
Ted Cruz doesn't need help from Betty or anyone else. He noticed a tweet from WA Government advising a woman that dancing will not be permitted at her New Year's Eve party. "Blue-state Dems are power-drunk authoritarian kill-joys," he retorted. "Washington State: NO DANCING ALLOWED!!! Any rational & free citizen: Piss off." The Princeton and Harvard Law alumnus failed to notice that WA Government is the handle for the state of Western Australia. Tweeted-and-deleted, but too late, and now the whole world knows he's an idiot. Piss off, Ted.
Nicolas Cage wants to be called a thespian rather than an actor, while acknowledging that he sounds like "a pretentious a-hole." I would suggest that the star of Jiu Jitsu, Gone In Sixty Seconds and Left Behind settle for actor. Or maybe "paid-up member of SAG."
What's the opposite of a ringing endorsement? "One of the great things about our democracy is that every citizen can decide to run for public office. Mehmet Oz has made that decision. And now it's up to the residents of Pennsylvania to decide who will represent them." You hear that, Pennsylvania? Mehmet Oz is a citizen. Oprah says so!
She may already be regretting that much, as the Oz phone skills rival those of a drunk Giuliani. Olivia Nuzzi of New York magazine called Lisa Oz, who tried and failed to hang up after a brief talk. Nuzzi got to hear the would-be senator and his wife call her "a liar" and "a fucking girl reporter," so they've mastered the Republican hatred of journalists. Now to work on the technology.
Get out your buckets and spades. "Maybe -- you know what -- maybe I should just dish all the dirt -- you know what, you know what -- I am going to dish it all on Trump next hour," promised Alex Jones on Wednesday night. Thursday came and went but the earth didn't move. Could Alex be fibbing? For once, you hope not.
Expect astrophysicists to go to the mattresses in 2022 -- the debate over the planetary status of Pluto is about to get crazy.
Bingham County, Idaho, Sheriff Craig Rowland can keep his job, but a judge says he must turn all his weapons over to the state police. The ruling stems from an incident when he pulled a Mormon youth group leader out of her car by her hair and pointed a gun at her. The aggravated assault and aggravated battery charges have been dropped. But can he carry one bullet in his pocket like Barney Fife? What if the LDS kids come back?
The BBC said its choice of Alan Dershowitz to comment on the Ghislaine Maxwell verdict was "not suitable." Then they invited her brother Ian Maxwell to defend his sister because Radio 4 doesn't count.
As the debate rages about asylum seekers and undocumented workers in the US, spare a thought for the thousands of Americans caught in a web of red tape abroad. As many as 30,000 are trying to renounce their citizenship and waiting for hearings at embassies and consulates closed by the pandemic. It was easier for Dillinger to escape from jail.
Maybe we'll wake up and it will have been a bad, bad, long dream.