They fought the law

 By any measure, Trump is the most lawless person ever to occupy, visit or deliver groceries to the White House.  It was clear long before he moved in that nothing about our legal system made any impression on his narcissism but bankruptcy law, repeatedly invoked to escape his collapsing businesses, and civil lawsuits brought to intimidate and punish his real and perceived enemies.  A judge just threw out his libel suit against CNN and the Justice Department is using public resources to sue a woman who wrote a book that displeased his wife.  There are probably others.  

Trump's last hope was in disqualifying Pennsylvania's 2.65 million absentee ballots, and now the firm that was representing him has withdrawn from the case.  Once the secretary of the commonwealth certifies Biden the winner (she has until November 23), game over.  Arizona, where another Trump lawyer threw in the towel, has already announced for Biden.  Georgians are wetting their thumbs and counting the ballots again, but that's looking Biden, too.  This would make his electoral total 306.

If that sounds familiar, it's because it was the number of Trump's TREMENDOUS LANDSLIDE in 2016, the yugest of all time, which he was still boasting about last January.  He used to pass out maps to anyone who visited the Oval Office, even Russians, because no one ever won so bigly.  (Except Reagan, and Nixon in 1972, who also won the popular vote, but that's ancient history.)  Trump is still holed up in his bedroom tweeting and eating, but at least his victory dance is over.

And now maybe Joe Biden can get his messages?  Some world leaders have called him directly, but most followed protocol and called the State Department, which is not passing the messages on.  We must just hope that touchy countries like China, which sent congratulations today, understand why their calls are not being returned.  Having dealt with Baby Shitpants for four years, they won't be surprised.  Pompeo's leaving today on his last world tour, so he can privately smooth things over.

What does Trump do all day now that he's stopped watching Fox News?  Plot more revenge, apparently.  After Mark Esper was fired, James Anderson, acting undersecretary for policy, resigned.  Some people applauded as Anderson, a popular Marine veteran, left the building, and now Trump wants the names of those who clapped.  If they get fired, too, the Biden transition team should buttonhole them on the way to the parking lot.

In the Washington Post Greg Sargent analyzes the delicious in-fighting among Trump's spawn and spawn-in-law about whether he should protect his "legacy" by simulating adult behavior (Jared and Princess) or spend the next four years bitching about a "stolen" election (Junior and the other idiot).  The Weirds versus the Beards.  "The only motivating factor in how this will be handled is what is good for Trump and the family," Sargent writes, with the interests of the United States not even getting a thought.  So much for making America great again.  And of course McConnell is throwing fuel on the fire to keep power by motivating aggrieved Trumpanzees to vote in the January 5 Senate runoff in Georgia, i.e., what's good for Moscow Mitch.  Quite a spectacle, and the party allowed it to happen by letting the creature in.  Putin has lost the White House but he still has a considerable hold on the nation.   (If TrumpTV fizzles like everything else he's ever done, it's possible RT has a slot for him.)

The purges continue!  Acting DHS Secretary and pretend-human Chad Wolf fired two of his top officials on orders from 30-year-old White House snotnose John McEntee.  But rumor says he refused to fire the cybersecurity chief Christopher Krebs, an election-fraud denier.  Revolt!   Is Wolf next?  Wouldn't it be hilarious if Pompeo got fired while he's in the Middle East?  Stop, I can't take any more.

Half an hour late Trump has put on clothes and waddled out to read, with his customary lack of affect or comprehension, a prepared statement about how wonderfully he has responded to the pandemic (1,172 deaths yesterday, 10,600 new cases).  No lockdown, he promises.  And the amazing Pfizer vaccine will take care of everything.  For this they deployed the Big Flag.  And now we hear from GlaxoSmithKline stockholder and head of Operation Warp Speed Moncef Slaoui, whose company is also working on a vaccine.  So, pandemic practically over!  Start saving up now, because this one will definitely not be free like Salk's.  "Time will tell" is as close as Trump can bring himself to acknowledging defeat.  Three hundred six, Donzo.  Does that ring a bell?

Nothing feels as good as escaping a kidnap-assassination plot, however shambolic, and Governor Gretchen Whitmer is celebrating by enraging the petroleum industry.  Specifically, blue state Michigan is suing to force Enbridge, Inc., to shut down its aging (1953) oil pipeline across the Straits of Mackinac, a decision which was hailed by the Bay Mills Indian Community.   Another pipeline is being constructed in the bedrock beneath the Straits, where it's less likely to pollute the water.  Keep 'em coming, Governor, the people are with you. 

Andy Borowitz writes, "Biden could receive classified intelligence just by hanging out in Mar a Lago dining room."  Yeah, but in the pictures it doesn't look too clean, and they'd probably overcharge him.  Three dollars for a glass of water?

They finally finished toting up Maricopa County and Arizona has gone to Biden -- just as Fox News reported on Election Night.  Martha McSally enters the Guinness book as the only person ever to lose Senate elections two years apart.  (Perhaps she'd like to run for governor next.)  Apparently Arizona voters don't care for people who attack their war-hero senator even after he's dead.  Even John McCain's widow Cindy said she was voting for Biden.  

It will be good to have a senator who's an ex-astronaut and has a scientific education.  It will help to offset this doofus.  Newly elected Alabama Senator Tommy Tuberville, whose last job was football coach, thinks his daddy invaded Normandy in 1944 to liberate Europe from "socialism and communism."  He also thinks the three branches of government are "the House, the Senate and executive."  He looks forward to using his Senate office to fundraise for the Georgia runoff, which used to be illegal but who even knows anymore?  They should make sure his desk is far from Ron Johnson's, to prevent a vortex of stupid from sucking everyone through the floor.  And since "coach" is one of those red-flag professions like "youth pastor" and "Scout leader," how long before former Auburn players start coming forward with, ahem, riveting allegations?  (Wikipedia says Doug Jones is "a leading contender" to become Biden's attorney general.)     

Like every other state but a tiny portion of upper New England, New Jersey is getting slammed with covid.  Governor Phil Murphy held a press conference to announce new restrictions on gatherings and businesses and to address complaints about masks:  "You know what's uncomfortable and annoying?  When you die."