The Absentee Drag

 

 

We're all a little jumpy from the long count (and in Georgia, probable recount), but I've decided to put down the razor, step back from the ledge and get used to hearing "President-elect Biden" everyplace but Fox News.  Hey!  I don't watch Fox News!  They can call him Trotsky for all I care.

It's gratifying to find the Trumpsters losing their minds.  For instance, Steve Bannon's unwholesome presence was kicked off Twitter and YouTube, and his lawyers in the wire fraud, etc., case have quit.  And all he did was call for Anthony Fauci and Christopher Wray to be beheaded and their heads displayed "on pikes" around the imperial palace White House.  Jeez, free speech, you know?  Help, help, he's being repressed.  I don't know why he waited until now -- maybe because yesterday was Guy Fawkes Day, maybe he was inspired by the murder of Samuel Paty in Paris.  Whatever, it's one more reason to add Opus Dei to the new Justice Department's list of terrorist organizations.

Hitler fanboy Madison Cawthorn celebrated his election to Congress from North Carolina with the generous tweet "Cry more, libs."  I wonder if Cawthorn knows the Nazis murdered disabled people like him, regarding them as "useless eaters."  Can I tell him?

History is cool.  On this day in 1860 Lincoln was elected.  And doesn't it give you a chill that it's all coming down to Pennsylvania, specifically Philadelphia?  The votes are being tabulated at the Convention Center, not far from the birthplace of the Constitution.  Trump hates Philadelphia for all kinds of mostly racist reasons, and the Trumpanzees are working hard to turn it into the hellhole he imagines it to be, calling in bomb threats that necessitate closing off whole blocks and suspending commuter trains.  Some clown drove up from Virginia with a weapon and was arrested.  It's scary but compared to Florida 2000 it's Amateur Night.  Trump will get more of a lift from Paula White's glossolalia.  (If you've never seen her act, treat yourself.  Remember Yoko Ono's first album?  This is nuttier.)

Meanwhile Trump expects his tame Supreme Court to cancel any absentee ballots cast for Biden.  So much anxiety could have been avoided if he hadn't criminally mishandled the covid pandemic and ordered Louis DeJoy to cripple the postal service.  So sad.  Sucks to be incompetent and corrupt, doesn't it?  You really need to get one of those right.  Better luck next time.

Yes, Trumbert Trumbert really dreams of a next time and is already planning to run in 2024, one of those perpetual candidates/jokes like Harold Stassen.  He's addicted to the howls of the mob and the platform for his hate.  Question:  Will people like Charley Koch and Shelly Adelson keep paying for his habit, knowing the money will go straight to his perpetually failing businesses?  Will cities keep providing venues and security on the cuff or demand payment up front?  Will the newsertainment industry cover the show?  I can answer that last one -- it's reality TV, isn't it?  Cheap, gaudy, as riveting as a six-car pileup to millions.  Kanye West got 60,000 votes.  Tesla Tequila sold out at $250 a bottle.  There's one born every 4.1 seconds (adjusted for population).

Maybe I don't read the right journals but I got lost somewhere as the letters piled up:  LGBTQ+, is that right?  So I was surprised -- pleasantly, I'm a lib -- that Joshua Query was re-elected to the New Hampshire House of Representatives.  Query describes himself as "gender non-conforming," and all I can imagine is Ursula LeGuin's The Left Hand of Darkness.  Although New Hampshire is probably not as cold as Gethen.  Anyway, congratulations and well done.  It's a strange and beautiful world.  Sometimes.