What's Ukrainian for "Nuts"?

 "It takes a special kind of son of a bitch to see innocent people fleeing their homes and think, 'How can I make this about me?'  But nobody does that better than Donald Trump," said Jimmy Kimmel, speaking for most of us.  At last night's Lago de Merde fundraiser, the SOB said admiringly, "He's taking over a country for two dollars' worth of sanctions.  I'd say that's pretty smart."  At the same time, if the election hadn't been stolen this wouldn't be happening, too bad, serves everyone right.  If the champagne-swilling crowd detected any contradiction, they haven't said.

War moves faster than it used to.  Five years into the Second World War the German commander at Bastogne demanded the surrender of Anthony McAuliffe's "battered bastards" and got the immortal response, "Nuts."  Barely a day into Putin's criminal war thirteen border guards on Snake Island in the Black Sea were called on to surrender by a Russian warship and replied, "Go fuck yourself."  All died.  One day we may learn their names.  Today we know the name of Vitaly Shakun, the Ukrainian soldier who died while detonating the Henichesk Bridge to stop a column of Russian tanks.  

On a conference call last night from besieged Kyiv Volodymyr Zelensky told EU leaders, "This might be the last time you see me alive."  None of them offered to send troops.  Only one head of state personally intervened at a Russian embassy:  Pope Francis.  Joe Biden repeated for maybe the thirtieth time, "We have no intention of fighting Russia.  We want to send an unmistakable message, though, that the United States and our allies will defend every inch of NATO territory."  Good news for Poland, Latvia, Lithuania and Estonia.  Maybe Finland would like to join.  Not much help today.

The Poison Dwarf is getting more pushback from his own people than from Europe, as 1,800 Russians were arrested at protests across the country.  From his latest kangaroo court Alexei Navalny called the invasion an attempt to "divert attention from Russia's problems," and he's probably right.  The European Broadcast Union courageously banned Russia from this year's Eurovision Song Contest, then changed their minds because it's "a non-political cultural event."  Could the EBU be as corrupt as the IOC?  Who gives a shit?

"I can't imagine why someone would look at what's happening there and see it as anything other than a criminal act, " John Kelly told Jake Tapper this morning.  John Kelly.  Retired Marine general.  Trump's chief of staff, and he can't imagine why Trump is full of praise for Putin.  It must be easier to make general in the Corps than I thought.  Trump, general, the fat guy who stood next to you at your son's grave in Arlington and said, "What was in it for them?"  Remember him now?  Kelly is just my age.  Should I start taking those jellyfish memory pills?

If everything is a distraction then nothing is a distraction unless it distracts from...I give up.  Marsha Blackburn (or is it Masha?) says it was "extremely inappropriate" for Biden to nominate Ketanji Brown Jackson to the Supreme Court on this of all days, when we should all be trying to stop Russian aggression with our minds, I guess.  What would be a good day, Masha?  You're not going to vote for her because she was a public defender.  Lindsey Graham isn't going to vote for her because she's not Michelle Childs.  John Kennedy is going to ask her nine times if she thinks cocaine should be legalized.  Rand Paul -- look, why don't you leave early and get a good seat at the book-burning?

Presidents have to multi-task.  Remember the last four years of no-tasking?  Unless you count eating documents and washing them down with Diet Coke while watching TV.  Joe Biden got a PDB today and you can believe he paid attention and asked questions.  He talked to NATO people.  He talked to economists about energy prices and inflation.  He was briefed on the war.  He introduced Judge Jackson.  He probably went to the toilet.  He got a covid briefing.  It's just another Friday.  Why anyone wants that job I could not say.

Senators don't have much to occupy them, it seems. They have time to jet off to Florida and make speeches to the deplorables, like Ted Cruz comparing Jen Psaki to Peppermint Patty (she has red hair).  Well, they thought it was funny.  For an Ivy League elitist Ted sure loves some children's lit -- he also read Green Eggs and Ham into the Congressional Record.  Maybe it's time to move on to Young Adult.  I think he'd enjoy the Narnia books.

The Poison Dwarf can multi-task, too.  He's hosting Prime Minister Imran Khan of Pakistan, who sounds thrilled to be in Moscow:  "What a time I have come -- so much excitement!" he was heard to say.  Just wait till the victory parade next May.  They're sprucing up Lenin.