Thanks for sharing

"The social media ramble ain't restful," Satchel Paige might have said, or tweeted, had he lived into this century.  No, but it's sometimes an awful lot of cheap fun.  It's Sunday, and that means it's time for Donnie Trump's Weekly Dump and Twitstorm.  His toilet text for today was a retweet from someone who glories in the name lana del fenty (probably an anagram, but I've never been good with those).  lana writes:  "Only true Americans can see that president Trump is making America great. He's the only person who can!  Haters are jealous of his success."  She/he concludes with a little American flag, which I can't reproduce, sorry.  Before too long, untrue Americans had dug up previous lanagrams, like "my room smells like pineapple and cum..." and "my pussy tastes like pepsi cola, my eyes are wide like cherry pies," suggesting that Donnie was a fan long before today.  The laughter of the haters was widespread and spasmodic, not unlike -- no, I won't go there.  I'll just say that the audience for bubblegum porn is surprisingly large and varied.

As the rest of the world waits to see what North Korea will try next, Donnie also decided to pass along a hilarious video of himself hitting Hillary Clinton with a golf ball.  Whump!  Right in the head!  Down she goes!  It's funny.  Not as funny, perhaps, as Jemele Hill being brained, or Elizabeth Warren, or Lisa Murkowski, Loretta Lynch, Susan Rice, Meryl Streep, Angela Merkel, Rosie O'Donnell, Beyoncé, Susan Collins, the Dixie Chicks, Heather Heyer's mother and all those other uppity bitches, but still.  The great Boris Blitt painted a New Yorker cover of Donnie smashing the White House windows with golf balls more than six months ago, which was not only remarkably prescient -- maybe it's not inherently "a dump" but is merely being used as one* -- but seems like grounds for a yuge plagiarism suit.

I just figured out what Ivanka does all day.  She's lana del fenty!




*When Bannon and Gorka were in residence, more of a Superfund site.