Doing everything wrong

 The first of May doesn't have much relevance to Americans, and deliberately so -- Labor Day in September was invented to sever the American labor movement from the rest of the world and create the occasion for back-to-school sales and a Jerry Lewis telethon.  Anyway, happy May Day to those who celebrate, including these French people who really want to stop working at 62. 

 

Normally when an individual is indicted on 34 felonies and released without bail the court requires at least that he surrender his passport, especially if he has an undisclosed amount of money (depending on whether he's fudging his taxes or boasting to his supporters) and a jet.  Clearly Trump is no ordinary accused felon because he just showed up in Scotland to open another golf course that local people don't want.  "It's great to be home, this was the home of my mother," he said, although she left as soon as she could.  The first minister of Scotland, Humza Yousaf, seemed less than eager to meet and greet, based on Trump's non-stop disparagement of Muslims.  The course at Menie near Aberdeen is already blamed for damaging the dunes system at Foveran Links.  Trump continues to despoil the earth.

Pudding Paws DeSantis should buy Greg Abbott a beer (not Bud Light) for briefly making him the second-most loathsome governor in the country.  Over the weekend there was a little gun spat in Cleveland, Texas, when Wilson Garcia asked Francisco Oropesa if he could maybe not fire his gun in his yard as they were trying to get the baby to sleep.  Oropesa is from Mexico but he's a gen-u-wine Texan now.  He went inside for some real firepower (AR-15, America's Weapon) and then killed Garcia's wife Sonia Guzman and four others, including eight-year-old Daniel Laso.  Then he took off and is still at large as I write.  Abbott immediately posted a $50,000 reward because he finally understands how guns are shredding the fabric -- I'm sorry, I must have my joke.  It actually says "a Texas Department of Public Safety top ten fugitive who is in the country illegally, and killed five illegal immigrants."  Because that's what matters.  Wilson Garcia came here from Honduras to escape gang violence.  He should have continued on to Canada.

Back in 2021 at the height of the CRT panic, Texas passed a law forbidding lessons that any one group is "inherently racist, sexist or oppressive."  If you read farther, it also outlaws assignments which involve "direct communications" between students and federal, state or local officials.  Yes, it's literally illegal to tell kids, "If you don't like it, call your Congressman."  This extends far beyond requesting a tour of the state capitol or asking the city council to put better lighting in the school parking lot.  It is part of the organized Republican effort to keep young people from even imagining they have rights, like the right to vote, read books, not go to work at 14, or seek out their own forms of entertainment.  It's also so spectacularly unconstitutional that I'm surprised the Texas legislature didn't burst into flames.

I won't say Joe Tacopina is floundering, but he spent part of the day questioning E. Jean Carroll over an episode of Law & Order:  Special Victims Unit about a pretend-rape that takes place in a Bergdorf-Goodman dressing room.  Jurors are supposed to think Carroll saw the show and thought, "I'll invent a story that that nice Mr. Trump raped me and make a lot of money."  Her lawyer needs to cite the painful back-story of Olivia Benson (Mariska Hargitay), who resulted from her mother's rape, and specifically the mother's descent into alcoholism.  Or just ignore the whole thing as a desperate distraction.

Gun violence is so "dog bites man" that sometimes it's relegated to the sports page.  During a college baseball game between Texas A&M/Texarkana and University of Houston/Victoria at Spring Lake Park in Texarkana, Matthew Delaney was hit in the chest by a stray bullet from an argument among five other men which quickly went Texas.  Delaney is in stable condition.  "The game was halted and deemed a no-contest."  

Squeaker McCarthy is flush with success after getting his demented clown caucus to agree on a budget that shits on all public programs.  He's in Israel, where he just invited his "dear friend" Benjamin Netanyahu to come visit Congress but ignore that mean Joe Biden.  He must have swallowed Trump's KoolAid about all those "disloyal" American Jews who vote Democratic even though Republicans are clearly Israel's best pals.  You know, the 75 percent who care more about the US and its frightening increase in antisemitic violence, none of it inspired by the left.

Or the Ohio Blood Tribe, disrupting a drag event in Columbus.  Definitely not ridin' with Biden.  Aren't they brave in their matching balaclavas?  "Under the Aryan Sun" is the name of my didgeridoo skiffle band.

Thanks, we're here all week.