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 It's Monday and I'm having more trouble than usual making sense of the world as filtered through the internets.  

In a setback for fans of media fluffing, Vladimir Putin has cancelled his annual press conference.  That means we won't see Russian "reporters" firing nerf ball questions about his favorite breakfast menu or his vacation plans or why Mother Russia is the happiest place on earth.  I get it.  Towards the end Lyndon Johnson didn't want to hear the word "Vietnam" either.

Departing Arizona governor Doug Ducey doesn't appear on lists of the most rabid Rightzis, but that may change after his final stunt:  Erecting a "wall" of derelict shipping containers at the Mexican border in violation of all sorts of federal and tribal laws.  He's blowing at least $95 million on this project, uglifying the national forest known as the Roosevelt Reservation and endangering migratory species, not to mention a firefighting agreement with Mexico.  That's a lot of spite for something that will have to be demolished in a few weeks.  But it makes a better symbol for his party than that tired old elephant.

Speaking of beasts, Empty Greene ventured into enemy territory (Manhattan) to tell some fascist gathering that if she and Steve Bannon had organized the January 6 coup it would have succeeded 'cause they "would've been armed."  To her this is proof that the whole thing was FALSE FLAG.  "A bunch of conservatives, Second Amendment supporters, went in the Capitol without guns and they think we organized that?  I don't think so!"  Silly libs, and just wait till she and her Subcommittee on How the Election Was Rigged start investigating how it was all Nancy Pelosi's fault.  Because the Democrats wanted to prevent the certification -- no, wait, that doesn't quite -- hey, look, a Black lesbian got ransomed instead of a MARINE!  Anyway, Margie found time for a little Christmas shopping in the big city.  We know because she reported to the crowd, "You can pick up a butt plug or a dildo at Target and CVS nowadays."  In Georgia you have to go to Home Depot.

Speaking of Paul Whelan, Trump spent the weekend ranting about "a stupid and unpatriotic embarrassment for the USA!" and how he could easily have effected his release, probably without even exchanging anyone, just on the basis of his negotiating skills.  Yeah, not so much, says former White House national security official Fiona Hill.  In her recollection Trump was "not particularly interested" in the Whelan case.  It was probably one of the days he spent obsessively tweeting about Rosie O'Donnell or how many times he had to flush to get official documents down.

Karen Bass was sworn in as the first female mayor of Los Angeles this morning, facing a daunting list of problems starting with homelessness.  Not everyone has trouble paying the rent, however -- some Angelenos shell out $18 for a loaf of Japanese white bread called shokupan when they can find it; the stuff sells out in minutes.  (Scalpers sell it for up to $33.)  "Orgasmic" it may be, but bread is bread.  White bread doubly so.

Ever since the ride-sharing services began there have been hair-raising stories of people being raped, assaulted and even murdered by Lyft and Uber drivers.  But did you know that some drivers use the time to proselytize to their captive audiences?  Driver/pastor Kenneth Drayton brags that his priority is to "introduce passengers to Christ."  How about introducing me to the airport on time?  You should be able to specify a driver who is a Jain -- they don't even accept converts much less seek them out.

The Keystone XL Pipeline didn't get built but the existing Keystone Pipeline is bad enough.  Last week it leaked 14,000 barrels of sludgy oil onto Kansas and Nebraska in time for cold weather to make cleanup even harder.  TC Energy assured people there was no threat to drinking water -- as long as it comes out of the faucet you can drink it.  

This just in:  Killer Kyle Rittenhouse says people need to start being held accountable.  See?

That's on Twitter, so you know it's true.  Accountable for what?  For getting your mom to drive you to another state so you can practice killing people?  Of course not.  He wants money from his fans so he can sue people who insist on calling him a murderer when everyone knows he was ACQUITTED!  Poor Kyle.  It reminds me of D.W. Griffith following up The Birth of a Nation with a movie about intolerance called Intolerance.  Not racial intolerance, silly, but the kind of intolerance suffered through the ages by people like Jesus Christ and D.W. Griffith.   (Some people thought his 1915 masterpiece was kinda racist.  In some cities it was actually censored.)  When you have that kind of moral blind spot you probably shouldn't own a gun or a movie camera.  

Just when I think I'm out they pull me back in!  Like the rest of my generation I went through a period of obsessing about the assassination of John F. Kennedy and all the inconsistencies of the Authorized Version before one day saying, "You know what?  I don't care why a man in Texas would send off to Chicago for a crummy bolt-action Italian war surplus rifle.  We'll never get to the bottom of this.  I need to buy some clothes and look for work."  Next week is the deadline set by President Biden for the release of all remaining records held by government agencies, and a researcher named Jefferson Morley says there is evidence in there of a CIA-Oswald connection.  Is it possible we'll finally know what happened six decades ago?  Or will it only lead to more conspiracy theories?  

...When you believe you will believe it heart and soul, that you were born and you grow old and never know...