Start making sense

 Like Whoopi Goldberg and Rachel Maddow but not nearly as well-paid, I could use some time off.  But as the great Flann O'Brien said, "When I want something to read I generally write it meself."  The jobs are up and the covid is down and farmers are recovering from the Trump tariff idiocy, but our news mediums are fixated on INFLATION, by one measure the worst since 1946.  You know, the year after the war.  Veterans flooding in with unspent pay, their womenfolk leaving industrial jobs with cash in the bank, things to spend it on after four relatively austere years -- more money chasing fewer goods.  Inflation.  Look it up.  It led to the greatest period of sustained prosperity ever, before the new housing boom, before the new middle class graduated from college on the GI Bill, before all the babies were born.  (But I can't get that PlayStation I want!  Biden is doooooomed!)

Don't ask me what's going on in eastern Europe, I don't know much more than Tony Blinken.  Why are we sending troops over if not to fight?  To make sandwiches for the Ukrainian Army?  I tell you what, when I hear fascism I think Putin, and the metastasizing convoys of "truckers" are a grand distraction.  I have to wonder about their claim to be a bunch of rugged, grass-roots freedom-lovers when I see Confederate flags and read of Rightzi governors raging at GoFundMe for refusing to have any part in this.  In short, I believe those Canadian dollars used to be rubles.  Disrupting fragile supply lines is a nice little extra.  Hey, Mr. Blinken, we're already at war.

And all around, the dance of crazy goes on.

If the Super Bowl isn't called on account of encroaching wildfires -- a first! -- America can look forward to a campaign ad for Jim Lamon, who wants to replace Mark Kelly by becoming Arizona's other Republican senator.  (See what I did there?)  It features a Western motif, as ol' Jim dresses up in a cowboy costume and pretends to shoot Kelly, Joe Biden and Nancy Pelosi.  (I guess he couldn't find an Anthony Fauci lookalike.)  Since Kelly got into politics after his wife Rep. Gabby Giffords was shot for real in 2011, mebbe it ain't all that clever.  I wasn't planning to watch anyway.

 Toilets are inherently funny unless you need one, and Trump needed one to flush documents he couldn't eat or shred.  So says star Times reporter Maggie Haberman, who evidently knew about this years ago but decided to sit on it (so to speak) until she was ready to publish her Trump book.  (I'm not giving the title.  Look it up if you care.)  What better week, with the National Archives begging the Justice Department to do something about this criminal?  As for Lisa Casey's comment above, maybe he's afraid of fire, too -- like dogs, sharks, birds, ramps, blood, death, hospitals, loud noises, wind turbines, powerful women, tie clips...

Boris Johnson has been taking his inner Trump out for walkies.  After he repeated a right-wing trope about Keir Starmer protecting Jimmy Savile, the Labour leader had to be rescued by police from an anti-vax mob near the Houses of Parliament.  (They just happened to bring along a noose -- where have I seen that before?)  Meanwhile Cressida Dick is being forced out as head of the Metropolitan police over charges that she refused to investigate lockdown violations by the Johnson gang and malfeasance by her officers.  Loads of Tories are saying out loud that if BoJo broke his own laws, it's no big deal -- where have I heard that before?  Was it Charles the First?  Or Nixon the last?

Not content with being the highest-paid employee of Auburn University -- I just know, all right? -- Tommy Tuberville decided to get into politics.  As reported by Business Insider, Coach has been trading stocks with both hands ever since he arrived in Washington a year ago.  He's outraged that a bill by Mark Kelly and Jon Ossoff would forbid members of Congress to engage in insider trading.  I'm outraged that it isn't already illegal.  But the Justice Department says it won't investigate the insider trading of Richard Burr -- look, has anybody checked on the DOJ?  Maybe they've all succumbed to a gas leak?

The mysterious hooded figure who showed up on security camera dropping off pipe bombs at the DNC and RNC offices in Washington has never been identified, but Baby Tuckoo insinuated that it maybe kinda looks like Kamala Harris, whose Secret Service detail found the bomb when she visited the DNC early on Insurrection Day.  Harris Hatred has become practically a board game all the family can enjoy if they're Trumpanzee/QAnon droogs.  She runs a toxic workplace, she talks funny in France and spends her own money on fancy pots, she has failed to solve the social problems that make people flee Central America, and sometimes she laughs.  The hate has spilled over to her husband, who had to be rushed out of Dunbar High School in Washington after a funster called in another Black History Month bomb threat.  Why are the left so humorless, huh?

Oh, this is adorable:  Twelve-year-old Leidy Gellona was barred by the YMCA from a swim meet in Superior, Wisconsin, because she had the words BLACK LIVES MATTER on her suit.  The decision was quickly reversed because guess what, assholes, this is what "political discourse" looks like.  (Not this.)  All it took was a few calls from her mother to the YMCA and NAACP, and online support from LeBron James.

Every day it seems there's an article about a Netflix doc called "The Tinder Swindler."  Every day I think, "I haven't seen Orlando in years."  I really need a break.