Everybody just calm down

It's under control.

Well, maybe not all.  The Dixie fire is not under control but authorities believe they have the man who started it.  U.S. Forest Agents grabbed Gary Maynard, who used to teach criminal justice at Sonoma State University, in the act of setting small fires which may have been intended to trap firefighters.  He is also a suspect in the Ranch and Cascade fires.  The judge had the good sense to deny bail.

Your ex-roommate won't be forwarding any more Facebook posts about covid vaccine turning people into monkeys.  "Astrazeneca created a vaccine based on chimpanzee genes, when tests showed side effects, this vaccine should be banned, otherwise we will all become chimpanzees" was the post, betraying the tortured English associated with Russian bots.  Sure enough, it was traced to a UK front called Fazze whose 65 Facebook and 243 Instagram accounts have been deleted.  Sorry, tovarisch, we happen to know vaccine is made from baby parts.  Magnetic ones.  You lose again, just like Cold War!

If you have $275 and a mean streak, you can go to a site called Cameo and strip Rudolph Giuliani of the last microfibers of his dignity.  Apparently ex-mayors of New York don't get a pension, because he will read anything you want to the person of your choice, no ups, no extras, as Earl Scheib used to say.  Because defrocked drunken lawyers with a carload of ex-wives and a teetering stack of legal bills can't be choosers.

In June we reported on the woman in Runcorn, Cheshire, UK, who was certain that children were being forcibly tested for covid in a marquee beside a pub (set up for patrons to watch European football).  She's back, and she brought friends.  A group of anti-vaxers in London stormed the building that was BBC headquarters until 2013, yelling that the media is the "real virus."   Piers Corbyn, their apparent leader (his brother used to lead the Labour Party), was heard to say, "We've got to take over these bastards," as police struggled to keep them out.  (The building now contains flats, a private club, and studios rented by ITV.)  Since no one brought bats or bear spray there were no serious injuries and the group soon departed for "BBC Southbank," which does not exist.  

Jeremy Corbyn isn't the only one with an embarrassing relative.  Chet Hanks, described as a "musician," delivered an unhinged rant about vaccines and masks despite his parents, Rita Wilson and Tom Hanks, having been among the earliest celebrity victims of the disease.  "Get over it!" he advised us.  "Sike!"  (Apparently a musician term.)  "You ain't sticking me with that motherfucking needle!"  This is why Rita and Tom have taken Greek citizenship.  

Probably there's a place I could actually watch the Cyber Symposium telethon but I don't know...we only get so much time on this poor old planet.  After "hackers" delayed the kickoff, Pillow Mike vowed to stay onstage and not even eat for 72 hours.  Then he did his first comedy bit, an extended struggle with the name "Bolsonaro."  The Trump of the Tropics sent his son Eduardo to explain that when he loses to Lula it will be a completely rigged, corrupt election.  In South America, they know how to do military coups right.  The ever-fragrant Steve Bannon sat in.  I'll check in tomorrow night, when Rupert Pupkin Lindell sings "You'll Never Walk Alone" to a portrait of Trump.