Unfair!

The saga of Danielle Stella, twenty-first century Republican, continues.  You may remember that we last heard she was the subject of a bench warrant issued when she failed to keep a court date on shoplifting charges.  Now she's the answer to the question "What in the name of Schuyler Colfax do you have to do to get kicked off Twitter?"  What you have to do is make up a claim that a member of Congress, Ilhan Omar, has passed "sensitive info" to Iran, and then call for her to be "tried for #treason and hanged."  That was too much for the platform that shares every Trump brainfart with the rest of the planet, apparently.  It's nuts, but it's hardly even racist.  And she does call for a trial first.  (The Washington Times is wrong.  I'm shocked.)  On a personal note, I'm grateful she said "hanged" and not "hung."

Even in these debauched times, Stella has zero chance of being elected.  The people who voted for Omar are unlikely to abandon her for a Trumpian crackpot, no matter how correct her syntax.  If this is the caliber of people it attracts, I almost feel sorry for the GOP.  (Not really.)  But Twitter has handed her a reason to scream "censorship" and maybe wangle an invitation to a Bill Maher show, or even Fox.  And once she slips into the chair opposite Hannity, the King of Hate Speech Himself will take up her cause.  Not only will she be back on Twitter at second hand, she might wind up in the White House as special deputy assistant to Andrew Giuliani or something.  

(Backstory:  Andrew G. is the administration's new Sports Liaison, whatever that is.  He certainly has the skills -- I remember him as a pudgy little kid, accompanying Mayor Daddy to opening day at Yankee Stadium.  We called him Young Wackford, as in Squeers, the RSC's production of Nicholas Nickleby having just been televised.  "Pastry makes his flesh gleam.  Parents think that's healthy."  He's thinner now, but bears a tragic resemblance to Eric Trump.  Andy gets $90,000 a year to steer his deeply-hated boss away from booing situations like the World Series and toward college football games deep in the old Confederacy, where he can feel the rigorously-enforced love of the fans if they know what's good for them.  I assume.  What else could it be?)

Other career possibilities for Sticky-fingers Stella:  Tulsi Gabbard's campaign manager; Mayor Pete's liaison to the Tea Party; vacation fill-in for Jeanine Pirro; the First Escort's personal shopper (five-finger discounts be best!); Secretary of the Navy.

See what you started, Twitter?  Give her the damn account back.