A soggy day
"'I wish I hadn't cried so much!' said Alice, as she swam about, trying to find her way out. 'I shall be punished for it now, I suppose, by being drowned in my own tears! That will be a queer thing, to be sure! However, everything is queer today.'"
It has been a queer week, in a country where the suggestion of tears once could end a campaign (see Muskie, Ed). Lawrence VanDyke, nominated for the US 9th Circuit Court of Appeals, sobbed during his appearance before the Senate Judiciary Committee just because the American Bar Association called him "arrogant, lazy, an ideologue, and lacking in knowledge of the day-to-day practice including procedural rules," i.e., another Trump/McConnell Special. Some of their current batch are so bad that even Ted Cruz has threatened to vote no, although it's just a threat.
Trump, of course, is a real man and never cries, but he always seems to inspire tears in others -- with one major exception. In a speech to something wonderfully called the Shale Insight Conference, he bragged of tearing up "the ridiculous Waters of the United States rule" (environment + Obama = BAD) and claimed that the "tough, strong men and women" who witnessed his act of courage "almost all of them were crying." Not because they want to drink clean water but because, well, "Sir, you've given our life [as miners and builders] back to us." This was not just bullshit, it was badly timed bullshit. Before it was shut down today, the Keystone Pipeline leaked 383,000 gallons of shale-tar oil onto North Dakota. Guess who wants to build another one.
In his long, incoherent speech/victory dance about the suicide of Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, Trump asserted that he was "whimpering and crying" before detonating his explosive vest. There is, of course, no evidence for this. His gleeful description of the children who died with him would be beneath contempt if it weren't certain Trump will say something even more despicable tomorrow, probably before noon.
Not necessarily untruthful, though. A roomful of checkbooks always seems to encourage truth-telling in these people. Recall that it was a private party surreptitiously recorded where Mitt Romney doomed his campaign by dismissing nearly half the country as "takers." At a similar gathering in Minneapolis, Trump decided -- who knows why -- to describe how Mrs. Steve Scalise "cried her eyes out" after her husband was shot at a baseball game. Her natural human response seems to have shocked him. "Not many wives would react that way to tragedy, I know mine wouldn't." This, we were told, was another of those Trump jokes that have to be explained. I don't think so. For one thing, she probably can't cry, or blink.
I suspect that not a lot of tears are being shed in New York City at the announcement that the tax-dodging Trumps are changing their official address to Palm Beach County, Florida. (Governor Cuomo claims they don't pay taxes anyway.) Perhaps it was the prospect of their stretch of Fifth Avenue being named Barack Obama Boulevard. Possibly this will make it easier to scrape the toxic Trump name off the building where they keep their fake Renoir, allowing other people to sell their apartments at less of a loss. Or maybe it's just because Trump Tower is a firetrap.
It has been a queer week, in a country where the suggestion of tears once could end a campaign (see Muskie, Ed). Lawrence VanDyke, nominated for the US 9th Circuit Court of Appeals, sobbed during his appearance before the Senate Judiciary Committee just because the American Bar Association called him "arrogant, lazy, an ideologue, and lacking in knowledge of the day-to-day practice including procedural rules," i.e., another Trump/McConnell Special. Some of their current batch are so bad that even Ted Cruz has threatened to vote no, although it's just a threat.
Trump, of course, is a real man and never cries, but he always seems to inspire tears in others -- with one major exception. In a speech to something wonderfully called the Shale Insight Conference, he bragged of tearing up "the ridiculous Waters of the United States rule" (environment + Obama = BAD) and claimed that the "tough, strong men and women" who witnessed his act of courage "almost all of them were crying." Not because they want to drink clean water but because, well, "Sir, you've given our life [as miners and builders] back to us." This was not just bullshit, it was badly timed bullshit. Before it was shut down today, the Keystone Pipeline leaked 383,000 gallons of shale-tar oil onto North Dakota. Guess who wants to build another one.
In his long, incoherent speech/victory dance about the suicide of Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, Trump asserted that he was "whimpering and crying" before detonating his explosive vest. There is, of course, no evidence for this. His gleeful description of the children who died with him would be beneath contempt if it weren't certain Trump will say something even more despicable tomorrow, probably before noon.
Not necessarily untruthful, though. A roomful of checkbooks always seems to encourage truth-telling in these people. Recall that it was a private party surreptitiously recorded where Mitt Romney doomed his campaign by dismissing nearly half the country as "takers." At a similar gathering in Minneapolis, Trump decided -- who knows why -- to describe how Mrs. Steve Scalise "cried her eyes out" after her husband was shot at a baseball game. Her natural human response seems to have shocked him. "Not many wives would react that way to tragedy, I know mine wouldn't." This, we were told, was another of those Trump jokes that have to be explained. I don't think so. For one thing, she probably can't cry, or blink.
I suspect that not a lot of tears are being shed in New York City at the announcement that the tax-dodging Trumps are changing their official address to Palm Beach County, Florida. (Governor Cuomo claims they don't pay taxes anyway.) Perhaps it was the prospect of their stretch of Fifth Avenue being named Barack Obama Boulevard. Possibly this will make it easier to scrape the toxic Trump name off the building where they keep their fake Renoir, allowing other people to sell their apartments at less of a loss. Or maybe it's just because Trump Tower is a firetrap.
posted by Buttermilk Sky at 12:28 PM
1 Comments:
"Not many wives would react that way to tragedy, I know mine wouldn't." — Donald Trump
Of course not. If Melania has any brains, (and most likely she does) the first call she'd make would be to a good estate lawyer.
After all, it's hardly the love match of the century. At one point, some blunt paparazzo asked Melania, "Did you marry Mr. Trump for his money."
And she parried, "Do you think Donald would marry me if I weren't beautiful?
Hey, I don't know whether it's a marriage, but it's sure as hell a cool transaction.
Yours crankily,
The New York Crank
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