Saturday, July 08, 2017

Send in the clowns!

And now, a man with a tape recorder up his nose.

The "president" nearly had to stay at the Hamburg YMCA because his crack staff -- the best people, believe me -- forgot to book a room.  If only the White House had some sort of "travel office" of people who do this sort of thing on a regular basis. 

World leaders were surprised to see the United States represented by a housewife with no education, training or experience in government and international affairs.  Then they decided Ivanka had just about as much to contribute as her daddy.  At least she didn't keep talking about John Podesta and Mika Brzezinski's facelift.

Vladimir Putin assured Trump he had no earthly idea who hacked the Democratic National Committee and state voter databases last year.  So that's that.  Meanwhile, Russians were busy hacking into American nuclear power stations.  Trump has spent most of his life in a clammy sweat that somebody somewhere might be laughing at him.  Yesterday Putin not only laughed at him, he dropped his trousers and mooned him.  What's the Russian for "cock holster"?

Very tough things happened to Poland during the second World War.  Very bad.  Did you know?  Nobody could have known.

Trump spent more than two hours with Putin and Lavrov.  Rex Tillerson was there to make sure they didn't get his wallet and watch.  As yet we don't know what "deliverables" were offered, but there is a rumor that Anchorage will soon be known as Putingrad.  This is in no way comparable to what happened in Munich in 1938.  Chamberlain did not give up the Sudetenland until Hitler demanded it. 

I was going to include the photo of Mike Pence slapping his hand on an exhibit of a space capsule labeled DO NOT TOUCH, but it was just too easy.  The Lab Rat has been musing about American domination of "the heavens," but it's not clear whether he's talking about some missile defense boondoggle or the theocracy he plans to impose as soon as the 25th Amendment is invoked.

Kim Jong-un has demanded that the G20 stop referring to him as "the elephant in the room."  He says he has a thyroid problem and also is big-boned.


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