Thursday, September 07, 2023

Laugh, damn it!


These folks were meditating during a yoga class in Chapel St. Leonards, Lincolnshire, when police burst in.  Someone saw them and reported that a mass killing had taken place.  Such is our world.

And such is our Senate:  The Secretaries of the Army, Navy and Air Force had to drive over to CNN and blast Tommy Tuberville for blocking hundreds of military promotions and "aiding communist and autocratic regimes."  Other senators have so far failed to drag this cretin into the cloakroom and feed him a knuckle sandwich because he makes so much sense:  "Secretary Del Toro, he needs to get wokeness out of our Navy.  We got people doing poems on aircraft carriers over a loudspeaker."  Sure we do, coach.  This has nothing to do with your anti-choice fanaticism.

It's not just the hair and makeup people at Fox News that Tucker Carlson misses -- he also needs a producer and maybe some researchers.  He's recycling a fifteen-year-old story about an ex-con who claims he had sex and smoked crack with Barack Obama in 1999.  Not even Hunter Biden.  And this is who he wants us to believe the classiest president in half a century hooked up with:

Of all the men who have fantasized about sex with Obama, this is the best he could do?

Speaking of fantasies, Trump is still convinced that Queen Elizabeth II was his biggest fan because she didn't speak her mind when he showed up late, and got in her way while they reviewed troops, and  brought his whole family to a state dinner as if the invitation said "plus five."  Not speaking her mind to nuisances was her superpower for seventy years.  Trump won't deign to debate any other contender for the Republican nomination, but he says he'd "love to debate" Meghan Markle.  "I didn't like the way she dealt with the queen...they treated her with great disrespect and I didn't like it."  He urged Hugh Hewitt to "set it up.  Let's go do something."  Anything to distract from the unpleasant news that his IT guy Yuscil Taveras has decided to cooperate with Jack Smith instead of going to prison for Trump like Peter Navarro, convicted of contempt of Congress.  The dominos are falling.  

The author of 2016's In Trump We Trust:  E Pluribus Awesome! is having second thoughts.  "Trump is done," declares Ann Coulter.  "After January 6 normal people...stopped paying attention to politics, it's just a drag."  "I haven't changed -- he has," she goes on, because he failed to destroy the government or lock up a single opponent, and only cares what "Manhattan elites" think about him.  As if the chump from Queens with the inferiority complex ever cared about anything else.  He called her "unbearably crazy."  She called him "a gigantic pussy."  Please, you're both right!  Hiss and make up.




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