The wheels come off

 

Did you know that Muslim parents in Dearborn who "oppose teaching pornography to children" are the new shock troops of the fascist right?   Neither did they.  It was the gist of a fake article posted as if to The Atlantic and guess who fell for it:  Proud product of Princeton and Harvard Ted Cruz.  When the hoax was explained he responded, "You guys are so insane it could easily have been real."  Fooling Ted is something of a national pastime like the ice bucket challenge.  Nobody in Michigan or anyplace else is teaching "pornography" to children, but that's become a shorthand description of sex ed beyond vanilla man-on-top-make-baby.  Why do we continue to be impressed by the Ivy League?

At a rake-stepping event in Philadelphia Mehmet Oz brought a woman onstage and "comforted" her about gun violence in her family.  He failed to mention that they had met before.  In fact, Sheila Armstrong is Philadelphia County Coordinator for the Oz campaign.  That doesn't make her grief at the deaths of her brother and nephew less real, it just makes Oz less honest -- a singular achievement when we're talking about Dr. Snakeoil.

Wasn't it clever of Governissimo DeSantis to lie to Venezuelan asylum seekers about jobs and then fly them to the redoubts of radicaliberals, like Martha's Vineyard and Kamala Harris's house?  He sure stuck it to the libs!  How could that possibly backfire?  Well, Sheriff Javier Salazar of Bexar County, Texas, has certified that 48 of them were the victims of a crime, paving the way for them to receive U-visas and eventually green cards.  Muchas gracias, Governissimo!  You moved them out of the path of a hurricane and jump-started their new lives in the US.  Be sure to mention that when you run for president.  I'm sure it will impress your party's xenophobic base.

"Abortionist bitch daughter"?  Ivanka?  What could Roger Stone possibly mean?  Maybe "abortionist" is just another term of abuse popular with idiots, like "woke" and "groomer."  If you know a fascist idiot, consider a word-a-day calendar for Christmas.  These people are as articulate as sandbags.

On Wednesday George Stephanopoulos suddenly remembered a 2016 Trump interview that might have been significant earlier.  "I asked him a question about...the Muslim woman whose son was killed and he attacked her.  And he just went after her."  That would be Ghazala Khan, mother of Captain Humayun Khan who was killed in Iraq.  "I was like, I guess the interview's over.  He just ended his campaign."  Stephanopoulos then tried to ask about Putin, causing Trump to flounce out of the room.  "I could hear the yelling in the hallway," which was Trump ordering Hope Hicks to bring Stephanopoulos out so he could yell at him some more.  It might have been responsible for this "journalist" to mention Trump's instability six years ago but he sat on it, and not even for a book like Maggie Haberman -- for twenty minutes (minus commercials) with Stephen Colbert.  You're a hero, George.  Take a gumdrop.

Trump was up most of the night assembling a compendium of bullshit which he addressed to Chairman Bennie Thompson after the "Unselect Committee" voted to subpoena him.  None of it was remotely factual, including an assertion of the last hearing's "very poor ratings," a Trump benchmark for everything.  Then he sent his smurfs out to tell people he "may choose" to testify.  Yes, and I may choose to win the National Book Award, but it's equally unlikely to happen.  

If Putin's ex-puppet is showing signs of "agitation, generalized slowing of mental and physical activity, increased appetite and unusual tiredness or weakness" it could be down to the nationwide shortage of Adderall announced by the FDA.  I'm sure he has sources beyond the legitimate ones, like Ronny Jackson, but we should watch for the symptoms anyway.  Slowing of mental activity?  As Dorothy Parker said of the death of Calvin Coolidge, how can they tell?