Just when you thought it was safe

 It seems there are limits, after all.  The State Board of Education turned down a group of Texas "educators" who wanted a textbook for elementary schools to describe slavery as "involuntary relocation."  I would like to think common decency prevailed (after a thirteen-hour meeting) but they probably just decided the language was too advanced for second-graders.  It's hard to describe America's founding atrocity without making students feel "discomfort, guilt, anguish, or any other form of psychological distress."  Maybe they should examine the way German schools teach the Holocaust.  (And then several Cherokee said, "About that involuntary relocation...")

But the Forney Independent School District in northern Texas is going ahead with plans to inculcate "future workforce skills" by forbidding students to wear skirts, dresses or hoodies.  I have no idea what workforce they envision, as professional women not only work in skirts but are frequently discouraged from wearing pants.  I believe nurses, janitorial personnel and fast-food workers routinely wear pants at work -- maybe that's what the district envisions for females in the workforce.  Did they get a leaked copy of a future Supreme Court decision?

There are lunatic courts everywhere, of course.  In France the government's obsession with what women can and cannot wear extends to the beach.  No, not teeny-weeny bikinis, just the opposite.  Grenoble decided that women can swim in public wearing the extremely modest burkini, for those (mainly Muslim) who wish to cover their heads, arms and legs.  Not so fast!  The country's highest administrative court the Conseil d'Etat has ruled that it violates "neutrality of public service," whatever that means.  The interior minister calls the ruling "a victory for secularism and above all for the Republic."  I long to live in a country so devoted to secularism but this is overreach.  It's a victory for making women choose between their religious beliefs and taking their kids to a beach or public pool.  What if a man wants to wear a kufi?  Or a yarmulke?

This could be bad news for Adam Kinzinger:  A federal judge in Florida sentenced David Hannon to three years' probation and a fine for emailing Rep. Ilhan Omar "Your dead you radical Muslim."  That was just the subject line -- he went on to threaten the rest of the "squad" and demand, "ARE YOU READY TO DIE FOR ALLAH?"  (It's all caps, even though he's described as "a former Trump supporter.")  But he's remorseful and he has a drinking problem and he's 67, hardly old enough to know better, so the judge disregarded the ten-months-in-prison guideline.  I guess it's all right to threaten a member of Congress if you're sorry, smashed and suffer from bad spelling.

William Bennett, Reagan's Secretary of Education, offered a fresh solution to all the mass gun murders:  exorcism.  He's been "thinking and studying about all these cases" by exploring the internet.  Thoughts and prayers indeed.  But did Father Merrin cast out his gambling addiction?

Joe Biden handed out the Medal of Freedom today and almost all the recipients were a thumb shoved in Trump's eye:  John McCain, Gaby Giffords, Khizr Khan, Steve Jobs (big tech!), Sister Simone Campbell (remember The Nuns on the Bus?), former AFL-CIO president Richard Trumka, Megan Rapinoe, civil rights lawyer Fred Gray, founding SNCC member Diane Nash, Brigadier General Wilma Vaught, Simone Biles ("Today she adds to her medal count of 32," Biden said), Denzel Washington, Raul Yzaguirre of La Raza and several others, none of them Federalist Society stooges.

Is nothing sacred?  Protesters crashed the annual July 4 hot dog eating contest at Nathan's Famous in Coney Island and Joey Chestnut threw one of them in a chokehold on the way to his fifteenth victory.  Three animal rights activists were charged with criminal trespass, disorderly conduct and harassment.  As we say in New York, "Hey!  I'm eatin' here!"

Animal activists of a different sort ran through the streets of Pamplona today pursued by bulls, but no one was gored.  All the injuries were caused by two-legged animals -- a broken leg here, a severed finger part there.  Everyone had a good time except the bulls, destined for the arena.

There was better news for animals in South Africa this week, as trophy hunter and tour operator Riaan Naude was found dead near Kruger National Park.  He was shot, presumably by humans.

Margie, Lauren, Kristina, Jerone, J.D., Doug, listen up.  This is how you do Republican:

"I have five grandchildren.  I would do anything -- anything -- to protect my five grandchildren.  Including, as a last resort, shooting them, if I had to, to protect the lives of my grandchildren.  Democrat bills that we've heard this week want to take away my right, my right, to protect my grandchildren.  They want to take away the rights of law-abiding citizens to protect their own children and grandchildren and wives and brothers and sisters."  Ladies and gentlemen, Rep. Debbie Lesko of Arizona.  

In the words of George W. Bush, "That was some crazy shit."