Hello, Cleveland!

 

As the days dwindle down to a precious few, we could all use a pick-me-up.  Who doesn't have troublesome dreams, evil forebodings and aversion to society?  Especially this society.

Trump wouldn't shift his ass to Virginia to campaign for Trump-clone Glenn Youngkin (who might lose) but he couldn't pass up a chance to be racist.  So he and what's-her-name showed up at the Astros-Braves game to participate in the "tomahawk chop" despite calling for a baseball boycott only weeks ago.  Next season the Cleveland team becomes the Guardians, leaving Atlanta to insult indigenous Americans alone.  And now he will take credit for the Atlanta win because why not?

Ado Campeol has died.  He invented tiramisu.  I don't care for tiramisu.  

Domestic terrorist Jenna Ryan is from Texas, whence she flew to Washington last January 6 in a private plane.  She calls herself "a real estate broker, self-help coach and media personality."  The media part  involves things like livestreaming herself beside a smashed Capitol window threatening to come after reporters next.  She threw in a plug for her real estate business.  (We can't even have a coup without a crummy commercial.)  She also tweeted that she has "blonde hair white skin a great job a great future and I'm not going to jail."  Prosecutors are asking the court for sixty days.  I'm sure they meant to say "years."  I hope they meant "years."  And one more for being an "influencer."  Could we bury that word under an Iceland volcano?

Theodore Chuang is the judge Ryan should be smirking at.  He just gave two members of The Base nine years (including "terrorism enhancement") for plotting to wreck power and rail lines, murder a Virginia legislator and free Dylann Roof.  They're sorry now.

But that's Maryland.  Over in DC, Judge Emmett Sullivan is tired of whining Proud Boy Christopher Worrell and his so-called medical problems as he awaits trial for the insurrection.  He's demanding surgery on his pinkie (which he declined before the riot) and treatment for cancer (for which he wants a "second opinion" before starting chemo).  The Department of Corrections "is running a jail, not a hotel," says Judge Sullivan.  Send Chris a copy of One Day In the Life of Ivan Denisovich.  I'll bet he's not vaccinated against covid either.

"Drive defensively" was cops' laughing advice to passengers as the Biden-Harris bus was attacked last year by a mob of Trumpanzees in San Marcos, Texas.  The SMPD only serve and protect the folks they approve of and now they're getting sued.  Why they aren't also getting prosecuted only Merrick Garland knows.  Texas is a time warp back to the assaulted Freedom Riders of sixty years ago.

"Let's go Brandon" is the coy and clever way to say "Fuck Joe Biden" for people who would never ever say a swear, nudge nudge, and now Southwest Airlines ("As slipshod as Ryanair without the charming accents") is investigating one of its pilots for letting his freedom of speech leak into his job.  Maybe better to take the train.

War on Halloween in DeSantis Land!  A woman in Hollywood wanted to dress as a condo building project but was told -- by police! -- that it would be considered a protest for which she lacks a permit.  Remember when Congress could make no law prohibiting the right of the people peaceably to assemble in seasonal costumes?  Good times.  Pass over those ambition pills.  I'm feeling poorly.