Unhappy talk

 On the fifth full day of the Biden administration, the way the president tells time continues to be of overriding importance.  Is he a big phony for wearing a Rolex?  Would it be phonier if a successful man bought a watch at the drugstore?  The internet is saying the watch belonged to Beau Biden, so by tomorrow the rightermost edge of Blogenheim will be whispering darkly that the decrepit, confused old man has conversations with his dead son.  (He also keeps Beau's rosary in his pocket, a whole other level of weird.)    

None of this should surprise those who remember "Ocasio-Cortez paid more than ten dollars to get her hair cut, what kind of socialist is she?"  Some of us can even recall "Al Gore talks about global warming but he lives in a big house!"  And probably has air conditioning, too.  This sort of thing evidently has deep significance for people who measure current events by the sneer on Tucker Carlson's face.  Of course if you attend an outdoor inauguration in sensible parka and mittens, you won't get credit for that either.   The one simple trick is not to give a damn.

The only aspect of Joe Biden's health I worry about is the possibility of carpal tunnel.  Every time I see him he's signing a stack of executive orders designed to restore this country to some semblance of normality while the Senate drags its feet on confirming his cabinet and squabbles over the filibuster.  It  got harder to pass the $1.9 trillion covid relief package, because the latest Article of Impeachment was just presented by Rep. Jamie Raskin (D-MD).  Another first:  no president ever incited an insurrection before. 

Two weeks ago Lauren Boebert was wearing a mask that said "CENSORED" while shouting into a microphone on the floor of the House of Representatives, on national television.  Not to be out-dumbed, Josh Hawley complained of being "muzzled" on the front page of the New York Post.  If everyone is not listening respectfully at all times or giving them money to produce written words, Rightzis think they're Galileo touring the Vatican torture chamber.  Regular people just have to put up with curbs on their free speech.  Last week Lauren Wolfe, an editor at the New York Times, tweeted that she had "chills" seeing Joe Biden's plane land at Joint Base Andrews.  For this she has been fired as Rightzis howled of media bias.  Not only fired:  in addition to the usual abusive messages, she was stalked and photographed walking her dog -- photographs which turned up in the very New York Post which was so solicitous of Senator Sedition's free speech.  No bias there.  No reason for the continued existence of the Times, either, as far as I can see.

Josh Hawley might want to think harder about how he exercises his right to free speech.  Someone discovered a column he wrote for the Lexington News back in 1995, when he was fifteen, praising good folks who "feel alienated from the government" and take refuge in militia movements.  The occasion was the bombing of the Murrah Building in Oklahoma City in which 168 people died, but there is no reason to think his views have matured since then.  He still gets a thrill when "the people" rise up against a "federal government...out to get them."  

Deborah Birx wants it understood that she was not free to say what needed to be said while she served as Mike Pence's "right arm" on the coronavirus task force.  Someone was slipping Trump what she charmingly called "a parallel data stream coming into the White House that were not transparently utilized," i.e., bullshit.  She did manage to pour on the syrup back then about the attention Trump paid "the scientific literature and the details and the data.  I think his ability to analyze and integrate data that comes out of his long history in business has really been a benefit during these discussions about medical issues."  Doctor, the man went bankrupt running a casino.  I wouldn't ask him to analyze the data on a box of Band-Aids.

Rudolph Giuliani's free speech in defense of his indefensible client slid over the line into defamation, according to Dominion Voting Systems, and now he's learning the price:  $1.3 billion, same as they're seeking from Sidney Powell.  (Lawyer:  "That's not a kraken.  This is a kraken.")   Trump's not paying him because he's a loser and I'm not sure Giuliani's YouTube extravaganza "Common Sense" -- Thomas Paine should return from the beyond to sue him -- is bringing in that kind of scratch.  (Although I was happy to learn he's sponsored by a "conservative alternative" to radicaliberal AARP.  One of the A's stands for "antifa," you know.)

Garret Miller of Texas is facing federal charges for participating in the January 6 terrorist attack but not for exercising his First Amendment right to tweet about it.  Not even "just wanted to incriminate myself a little lol" and "Assassinate @AOC."  Just caught up in the spirit of -- he's 34?  Jeez.

White House press briefings will feature a sign-language interpreter.  It's a rich and subtle language.