Coprogenesis

When a massive shitstorm is accompanied by a huge drop in barometric pressure, it's called coprogenesis.  New levels of depravity call for new words, and this is mine.

Remember when Barack Obama posed for selfies with a Chinese sex trafficker?  No?  Oh, that's right, he didn't.  Li Yang covered a lot of bases, also snapping herself with Matt Gaetz (who represents her district), Louie Gohmert (who doesn't) and Robert Kraft (satisfied customer), all partying at Mar-a-Lago where she definitely has never under any circumstances had her masseuses make house calls.   Go Patriots!  MAGA!

The office of the Special Prosecutor, Robert Mueller, has been funded through September.  This must be what Vladimir and Estragon felt like, every day of their lives.

America is coming to grips with the astonishing news that there is a different system for getting the thick, lazy offspring of rich people into expensive universities, and that corruption and bribery are involved.  This is called "white affirmative action," and has existed for approximately a century and a half.  The problem arises when people spend thousands rather than millions, paying off a tennis coach instead of ponying up for a new dormitory or computer center.  Of course, it's possible that George W. Bush got into Yale on his grades, test scores and superior cheerleading skills.  It's also possible that I will win the Nobel Prize in literature.

"I can tell you I have the support of the police, the support of the military, the support of the Bikers For Trump -- I have the tough people but they don't play it tough -- until they go to a certain point and then it will be very bad, very bad."  In case you didn't recognize the repetitious cadence of dementia, that's Donnie in a Breitbart interview, and "they" are the Democrats who defy him, presumably including the twelve Senate Republicans who joined in a vote to terminate his phony "emergency" 59-41.  It's not even a veiled threat of violence -- are Bikers For Trump some sort of praetorian guard?  We're continually invited to look with horror on events in Venezuela, but isn't that precisely what happens when a weak, incompetent dictator clings to power by unleashing troops to shoot and gas people?  It's a matter of time before Cadet Bonespurs starts appearing on his balcony in a gaudy uniform and makes the Secret Service wear MAGA hats.

I couldn't teach my grandmother to make braciole and I can't teach Nancy Pelosi to do politics, but I was taken aback when she refused even to consider impeachment for the would-be presidentissimo.  "He isn't worth it"?  Then who is?  Why do we have it?  "It will divide the country"?  Look  around, Madam Speaker, the divide is already an abyss.  I understand, you could get the House to vote articles of impeachment tomorrow morning, and the Senate would acquit before leaving for the weekend, followed by two solid days of "NO COLLUSION WITCH HOAX DEMOCRAT JEW HATERS ICE CREAM!!" tweets.  Maybe worse than a waste of time.  I will let you handle the politics while Mueller does the criminal prosecutions.  You were masterful in turning the persecution of Ilhan Omar into a put-up-or-shut-up on all forms of bigotry, and now we've got the racists and Islamophobes on record.  Maybe Pence would be worse -- he's a zealot rather than a lazy slob, but for all his religiosity I don't hear any glue-eaters hailing him as God's Anointed.  Keep baffling and curbing Trump, and I'll keep hoping it's the best course.

I credit a sense of humor with keeping me sane (now in my moderate to severe sixties), but I may have been mistaken all this time.  First Trump protested that his infamous "Russia, if you're listening" invitation to release Hillary Clinton's stolen emails was sarcasm.  Today Piers Morgan called on Trump to step in and fix the Brexit mess for Theresa May, and after being the subject of much derision, insisted he was joking.  Gents, please, could you employ the term LOL?  I appear to have lost all my mirth.  Thank you.