Thursday Follies
This is great.
A bunch of Rightzi Congressmen, including Usual Suspects Gohmert, Rohrabacher and Steve King, are meeting with a Rightzi reality TV star and would-be Fuhrer named Tomio Okamura. His stated program: "We want to stop any Islamization of the Czech Republic. We push for zero tolerance of migration." Also the gassing of Jews, gays and Roma. I know, I read it twice. Then I looked closely at the photo. If elected, he'll presumably deport himself to Japan. Consistency, right?
The real George Soros, not the sinister Slenderman who lures children to the woods and makes them eat organic broccoli, said at the World Economic Forum in Davos, "I consider the Trump Administration a danger to the world. But I regard it as a purely temporary phenomenon that will disappear in 2020 or even sooner." Let the conspiracy theories gush forth, let the heads explode all over the white people's couch.
Clearly Soros is behind the vast conspiracy/coup against the Leader being plotted by -- no, wait for it -- the FBI. Because the deputy director's wife ran unsuccessfully for the Virginia legislature as a Democrat, see, and there's this memo...look, I can't keep it all straight and I don't have to. Forgotten are the Comey October Surprise and the hostility to Hillary Clinton; now they're being compared to the KGB. (Not the Gestapo, Sean?) You know, Putin's old outfit...oh, wait.
"Secret Society" is the password of the day over at Fox. It seems that two FBI agents, Peter Strzok and Lisa Page, exchanged a single email in which they joked about setting one up, and offering beefcake Putin calendars to members. The Rightzis pounced on this as if it were Hillary's long-sought email ordering ISIS to attack the consulate in Benghazi. That's what happens when you have no sense of humor or other higher brain function.
Keep an eye out for the blandly named "Council for National Policy." It's a cabal of fundamentalist theocrats who want to turn American education over to the religion industry -- the "Judeo-Christian" one, of course. Normally we could just ignore these nuts, but most of Betsy DeVos's relatives are active in the organization. Already in Mississippi, a legislator named Credell Calhoun, who claims to be a Democrat, has introduced a bill requiring public school teachers to recite the Ten Commandments every morning. Since surveys show few Americans are familiar with the Constitution, the time could be better spent reciting the Bill of Rights, or possibly just the Establishment Clause, which forbids the kind of crap Calhoun is pushing. If it somehow becomes law, the little kids will giggle all day about "coveting thy neighbor's ass," while the older ones may wonder why the president gets a pass on "Thou shalt not commit adultery." (Certain presidents, anyway.) And in an open-carry, death penalty state like Mississippi, whatever will they make of "Thou shalt not kill"? Better leave that can of worms unopened, Credell. Let the churches peddle the Iron Age superstitions. That's what they're for.
Unable to find anything they liked in the National Gallery or the Smithsonian, the Trumps asked the Guggenheim Museum to help them class up the White House by lending Van Gogh's "Landscape With Snow." (I'm guessing this was all FPOTUS -- Donzo wouldn't know Van Gogh from Van Halen.) Sorry, no, said the Gug, but how about Maurizio Cattelan's "America"? It's solid gold, and it flushes.
A bunch of Rightzi Congressmen, including Usual Suspects Gohmert, Rohrabacher and Steve King, are meeting with a Rightzi reality TV star and would-be Fuhrer named Tomio Okamura. His stated program: "We want to stop any Islamization of the Czech Republic. We push for zero tolerance of migration." Also the gassing of Jews, gays and Roma. I know, I read it twice. Then I looked closely at the photo. If elected, he'll presumably deport himself to Japan. Consistency, right?
The real George Soros, not the sinister Slenderman who lures children to the woods and makes them eat organic broccoli, said at the World Economic Forum in Davos, "I consider the Trump Administration a danger to the world. But I regard it as a purely temporary phenomenon that will disappear in 2020 or even sooner." Let the conspiracy theories gush forth, let the heads explode all over the white people's couch.
Clearly Soros is behind the vast conspiracy/coup against the Leader being plotted by -- no, wait for it -- the FBI. Because the deputy director's wife ran unsuccessfully for the Virginia legislature as a Democrat, see, and there's this memo...look, I can't keep it all straight and I don't have to. Forgotten are the Comey October Surprise and the hostility to Hillary Clinton; now they're being compared to the KGB. (Not the Gestapo, Sean?) You know, Putin's old outfit...oh, wait.
"Secret Society" is the password of the day over at Fox. It seems that two FBI agents, Peter Strzok and Lisa Page, exchanged a single email in which they joked about setting one up, and offering beefcake Putin calendars to members. The Rightzis pounced on this as if it were Hillary's long-sought email ordering ISIS to attack the consulate in Benghazi. That's what happens when you have no sense of humor or other higher brain function.
Keep an eye out for the blandly named "Council for National Policy." It's a cabal of fundamentalist theocrats who want to turn American education over to the religion industry -- the "Judeo-Christian" one, of course. Normally we could just ignore these nuts, but most of Betsy DeVos's relatives are active in the organization. Already in Mississippi, a legislator named Credell Calhoun, who claims to be a Democrat, has introduced a bill requiring public school teachers to recite the Ten Commandments every morning. Since surveys show few Americans are familiar with the Constitution, the time could be better spent reciting the Bill of Rights, or possibly just the Establishment Clause, which forbids the kind of crap Calhoun is pushing. If it somehow becomes law, the little kids will giggle all day about "coveting thy neighbor's ass," while the older ones may wonder why the president gets a pass on "Thou shalt not commit adultery." (Certain presidents, anyway.) And in an open-carry, death penalty state like Mississippi, whatever will they make of "Thou shalt not kill"? Better leave that can of worms unopened, Credell. Let the churches peddle the Iron Age superstitions. That's what they're for.
Unable to find anything they liked in the National Gallery or the Smithsonian, the Trumps asked the Guggenheim Museum to help them class up the White House by lending Van Gogh's "Landscape With Snow." (I'm guessing this was all FPOTUS -- Donzo wouldn't know Van Gogh from Van Halen.) Sorry, no, said the Gug, but how about Maurizio Cattelan's "America"? It's solid gold, and it flushes.
posted by Buttermilk Sky at 2:29 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home