Duck and cower

 

"When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time."  (Maya Angelou)

Treason is so amusing.

For a few hours there was a new star in the Trump firmament as Ricky Shiffer joined Ashli Babbitt in the chapel of martyrs/omelet bar.  Shiffer was a January 6 insurrectionist with a Ministry of Truth Social account who thought he could penetrate bullet-resistant glass at the Cincinnati FBI office with a nail gun, i.e., a real Trumpanzee.  He apparently had a real gun and fired it at Ohio state police during a six-hour standoff, which ended when one of the troopers killed him.  His last post was a call to end the last two years of "tyranny" by purchasing guns and "kill[ing] the FBI on sight."  

Today, however, none of the proponents of civil war who clog the airwaves and social media is lifting the Trump flag that fell from Shiffer's lifeless hands -- not even Empty Greene, to whom Shiffer addressed one of his last Truths.  Today he's another false flag antifa crisis actor, come on, a nail gun?  Which is pretty funny because Shiffer himself has asserted that the Uvalde and Buffalo murders and others in "left wing controlled areas" were, yes, false flags.  Rightzis are not violent, they just want to kill all the FBIs.  Careful of that rabbit hole.

Seriously, why is there no chapel on the grounds of Bedminster?  In Zero Fail, Carol Leonnig explains how Trump got a tax break from the state by setting aside of couple of acres to grow hay and raise goats, calling it a farm.  Now it's also a cemetery.  The Church of Ashli would make the whole place tax-exempt, wouldn't it?  Knowing Trump, he'd want a statue of himself.  And he could sell souvenirs relics and offer ten, twenty and fifty-dollar votive candles.  Perfect for weddings, exorcisms and miracles.

It's a miracle the country survives.  According to the Washington Post, the search was for "classified documents relating to nuclear weapons" which were "potentially in danger of falling into the wrong hands."  As if they weren't already.  It could explain the search warrant do-si-do.  First Trump demanded that the Justice Department release the warrant, which he could have done himself since it was handed to one of his lawyers.  Yesterday, in a rare public statement, Merrick Garland said the DoJ had asked the court to unseal the warrant and the property receipt for the papers they took away.  Not good enough, says Lindsey Graham, we wanna see the affidavit where they explain why they need to look through Trump's sock drawer.  But the affidavit probably contains evidence that can't be made public (see nuclear weapons) as Graham well knows.  If the judge unseals the warrant, they'll want to see his law school grades and campaign contributions, if not his DNA.  Was he born in Kenya?  He was probably born in Kenya.

There are Republicans on the House Intelligence Committee, calling its name into question, and they had serious things to say about the Mar a Lago Massacre.  Ohio's Jim Turner wasn't bothered by the shootout in his state but apparently he Googled "nuclear weapons" and reported that there are things about nuclear weapons you can "find on your phone."  Chris Stewart of Utah asked the questions we're all asking:  "Was it nuclear?  Was it -- heck, maybe it was aliens."  (Trump knows the truth is out there.)  Markwayne Mullins (Oklahoma) won the gumdrops by invoking Hillary's emails, but Elise Stefanik brushed him aside, yelling "Hunter Biden!"  Nothing to say about Vince Foster or Whitewater?  Heck, maybe it was Uranium One.  Won't somebody think of Chappaquiddick?

It was left to Brian Kilmeade to remind Foxniks of the real terror ahead:  TAXES!  The IRA wasn't allowed to raise taxes on the obscenely rich (thanks, Kyrsten) but it contains $80 billion to track down the merely rich who aren't paying their meagre share.  Or as Kilmeade put it, "Joe Biden's new army."  Yes, "A little like James Bond, but instead of hunting down evil maniacs, these agents hunt down and kill middle-class taxpayers that don't pay enough."  He warned that the accountants -- uh, special agents -- will be carrying guns, which will somehow distinguish them from millions of other Americans, and they'll break down your door shouting "Pay or die!"  (Kilmeade was substituting for Tucker Carlson so he had to ramp up his crazy rhetoric.)  It seems like the way to avoid the "weaponized" IRS and the structural damage would be to pay your damn taxes, but I'm no expert.  

If your nom de Twitter is #BillionDollarLawyer it's a safe bet you're going to get a call from Trump sooner or later.  Especially if you practice in Georgia, where he's under criminal investigation for trying to ratfuck the 2020 election.  Even if, like Drew Findling, you have called Trump "pathetic" and "the racist architect of fraudulent Trump University" and have pledged to "restore a woman's right to choose, which has been destroyed by the Supreme Court."  Findling must know his chances of getting paid are somewhere between Giuliani and never, but I guess he likes a challenge.  It's certainly a change from representing LeBron James and Cardi B.

Yes, last Monday was the anniversary of the Great Resignation.  I remember it well.  I got my first job the week Nixon lost his.  Forty-eight years ago, which I why I don't worry about taxes anymore.  I'm one of Mitt Romney's "takers" and proud of it.  And Ron Johnson from Wisconsin can have my Social Security when he pries it from my cold, dead hands.  

Salman Rushdie was stabbed in the neck in Chautauqua, New York, this afternoon and is still in surgery at this writing.  Fatwa fulfiller who didn't get the memo or random nut?  In America, who knows?