JFK, ELVIS ON SECRET ISLAND!

 Some days the world just looks like one of those nasty-looking tabloids that used to grace supermarket checkout lines.  Today in "Hillary's alien baby" news:

Mama needs a new wimple!  Sister Mary Margaret Kreuper, retired principal of St. James Catholic school in Torrance, California, admitted she embezzled $835,000 in church funds over ten years to cover her gambling debts.  She's said to be contrite.

Is Kim Jong-un dying?  Or is he just looking fabulous on the Pyongyang diet?  Inquiring minds want to know!

Doctor Why?  It's been nearly a year since Dr. Stella Immanuel claimed her fifteen minutes of fame, when Trump signed on to her demons-and-hydroxychloroquine theory of covid.  There's a new crackpot in town and her name, I swear, is Dr. Sherri Tenpenny.  She told the Ohio legislature that there's metal in the vaccine which makes recipients magnetic, because 5G cellphone towers.  It's proven!  Remember, she's a licensed doctor.  In Ohio.

Did the ginger duke and his American wife have royal permission to name their daughter Lilibet?  This is a very major important question, apparently, and no doubt we will hear more in days to come.  Imagine if they had called her Helix or Edible.

Do you want it fast or perfect?  A study by Public Health Scotland found a slightly higher risk of a rare blood disorder in people who received the Oxford/AstraZeneca covid vaccine.  Jonas Salk took six years to develop his polio vaccine in the days before gene sequencing.  This one rolled out in about six months.

Infrastructure Week is here!  In Texas.  Levees around Mission, Texas, were dismantled to build Trump's WALL and now the Army Corps of Engineers is rushing to replace them before hurricane season.  Even Ted Cruz wrote a letter to Joe Biden demanding action, without acknowledging that Trump is once again the cause of the crisis.  And yet Cruz and the other seditionists won't vote for the infrastructure bill because "the era of bipartisanship is over."  A little louder, Mitch, Joe Manchin can't hear you.

The movement for women's suffrage began in New York, specifically Seneca Falls in 1848.  So a lot of New York women will be wondering why Kristen Gillibrand couldn't be arsed to vote on the Paycheck Fairness Act.  It would have sent a message in spite of the Manchin Filibuster.  (May as well give credit from now on, it's his only notable achievement.)