All over the map

 Do you want the good news or the bad news?

Marine LePen's Rassemblement National lost a regional election it was poised to win in its southern stronghold of Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur.

After a debate which Emmanuel Macron described as being about "civilization and culture" Hungarian prime minister Viktor Orban was handed an ultimatum:  Protect LGBTQ rights or leave the European Union.  Hungary recently enacted a law to "protect" children from gay people that mirrors Russia's.  "Hate, intolerance and discrimination have no place in our Union," said Luxembourg prime minister Xavier Bettel.

A senior official of the UK Ministry of Defense left a bunch of "top secret" documents at a bus shelter in Kent, and if you believe that, you'll believe the rest.  A member of the public turned them in, not to the ministry but to the BBC.  Now Tory MPs who want to destroy the BBC accuse it of paying the person and then reporting on the incident.   

In other Boris buffoonery, the Health Minister Matt Hancock resigned after he was caught kissing his aide/mistress Gina Coladangelo, which is not allowed under covid social distancing rules.  His successor Sajid Javid has removed the spy camera from his office. It sounds like a good idea.

Here comes a whiz-bang!  Comet Bernardinelli-Bernstein is a thousand times larger than the average comet and will reach our solar system in 2031.  That's right, they can see it from ten years away.  Plenty of time to design the shirts and commemorative cocktails.

Mel Brooks is 95 today, definitely good news!

Just when you were planning to take Michael Bender's book to the beach along comes Michael Wolff with Landslide, the closing volume (we fervently hope) of the Trump trilogy.  Wolff covers the Sit Room yelling about unleashing the Insurrection Act on BLM protesters while Mark Espy and Bill Barr both shoot it down.  He also takes us inside the abortive coup, as Mark Meadows protests that Trump can't really lead the mob to the Capitol and gets the response, "I didn't mean it literally."  Of course he didn't.  Back at the White House Trump can't believe those "trailer camp" people in their low-rent "getups" represent him, and jokes about investing in tattoo parlors.  At his elbow, Princess dismissed it as an "optics issue," while Giuliani was "drinking heavily and in a constant state of excitation, often almost incoherent"-- America's mayor?  I guess I can manage two beach books.

In other words, Trump has such contempt for his disciples that he slanders them as "Democrats."  Well, guess what?  The QAnon core of Trumpworld is fed up with him, too, if reactions to the big Wellington jam are to be believed.  "I support Trump but this is getting ridiculous," one wrote.  Failing to read the room, he never mentioned the insurrectionists who are "rotting in jail," and he boasted about vaccine even though the Qs know the pandemic is a "hoax."  "Nothing but carnage everywhere you look," said the Leader, quoting his own inaugural rant.  Where are the new songs?  When does the balloon go up?  When can we hang Mike Pence?  Some are convinced he's dead, replaced by a clone.  Bo-ring!

Well, Cy Vance and Tish James have given Trump's remaining un-disbarred lawyers until Monday to dissuade them from filing criminal charges against The Organization, so threats of violence have not deterred them.  Popcorn time.