Thursday, December 13, 2018

Pensive

Twitter users mercilessly mock Mike Pence for 'Elf on the Shelf' performance in Oval Office

(Mmmm...gonna get some blue drapes for this room in a few months...Jackson's gone, picture of Jesus in the garden, always liked that...have to make sure I'm never alone with Nancy...what's this, Wednesday, cottage cheese and strawberry Yoohoo for lunch...wonder if I still have that badminton racket...badminton could be my thing, like golf for Ike and Tubby here...Nancy has amazing legs, what is she, eighty?...no, no, think about cottage cheese...Mother has legs like cottage cheese...gosh, Tubby, let the lady finish a sentence...poor Kelly, he was actually crying while he cleaned out his desk...have to throw him a bone when I take over...ambassador to someplace warm...Ayers was a nice guy, but I overheard him take the Lord's name in vain...have to remember, get that recording system in my office removed...next guy can install his own...Nancy's from Sin Francisco, really be a feather in my cap on Judgment Day if I brought her to the Lord...we could read the Bible in here...must stop thinking about Nancy!...so hungry...wall, wall, enough about the stupid wall...I wonder if she and Schumer -- no, that's crazy...why exactly am I here?)

2 Comments:

Blogger MarkS said...

Brava! You have outdone yourself.

6:15 AM  
Blogger The New York Crank said...

Ridiculous! How can the man possibly have any thoughts at all? He clearly has been embalmed.

Yours crankily,
The New York Crank

8:06 AM  

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