Wednesday, July 06, 2022

Summertime and the living is crazy

 Terrorists have bombed the Georgia Guidestones in Elbert County.  Krazy Kandiss Taylor has already praised her god for doing it all by himself/itself.  But Alex Jones demurred:  "We need that evil edifice there as a confession letter led by a consortium of eugenicists."  And no, I have no clue.

But wait!  There's more.

Under their own rules the Tories can't hold another no-confidence vote for a year.  But unlike the Guidestones that one is not carved in granite.  They could change it if enough of them decide Johnson is an albatross.  The current crisis has nothing to do with partygate or cash-for-honours or spectacular unfitness for office.  It stems from an ex-deputy whip called Chris Pincher (Dickens didn't have to make up names) whose career BoJo promoted despite his tendency to get pissed and grope men.  This has been going on since 2017.  The BBC is camped outside No. 10.  Stay tuned.

The delightfully named Congregation L'Dor Va-Dor of Boynton Beach, Florida, is suing the state because its abortion law "prohibits Jewish women from practicing their faith free of government intrusion, and this violates their privacy rights and religious freedom."  Moreover, the law "threatens the Jewish people by imposing the laws of other religions upon Jews."  Mazel tov!

Normally I taste vomit when the phrase "Marjorie Taylor Greene teased" appears on my screen, but this is really funny.  Empty told Alex Jones she might very well consider running for president (Trump has disappointed many lunatics by promoting covid vaccine, which Jones claims will give you monkeypox).  Jones thinks she's smarter than "dumbass" Trump.  I couldn't possibly comment.

Unable to read a room, much less a death-weary country, the NRA tweeted "Since 1950, 94 percent of mass public shootings occurred in gun-free zones."  To which Illinois Governor J.B. Pritzker retorted, "And 100 percent of mass public shootings happen with guns.  As Governor, on behalf of the people of Highland Park -- leave us the hell alone."  Robert Crimo, arraigned today on seven counts of first-degree murder, apparently planned to proceed to Madison, Wisconsin, for another attack but changed his mind.  

We should celebrate when mass murder does not occur.  Acting on a tip, police in Richmond arrested two Guatemalan men ages 52 and 38 who planned to shoot up a July 4 parade.  Their ages are significant because they create a problem for mass-violence experts at Fox News who know the trouble is not and never will be the guns.  Laura Ingraham says it's the legal government mary-jane that's making them psychotic, which she can tell by looking in their eyes (in a photograph); while Tucker Carlson knows America's young men are being emasculated by "a solitary fantasy world of social media, porn and video games."  And women yacketing at them about their "male privilege," which is just so much chin music.  The two middle-aged Central Americans don't quite fit, but you can be sure they wouldn't be here if Trump had finished WALL.  I hear Baby Tuckoo's mom left him one dollar in her will, but that's neither here nor there, right?

In the ad of the week, Arizona Congressional candidate Jerone Davison drinks from an American flag mug, prays, then defends his home from "Democrats" in Klan robes with an AR-15.  If this is not satire, Arizona is fucked up worse than I thought. says an asteroid the size of a bus will pass by our home planet today.  If it was a real bus I would flag it down.



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