Wednesday, January 12, 2022

No reverberation

 Someone is giving Trump bad advice, and he's taking it.  Steve Inskeep of NPR -- yes, National Public Radio, not some new Pillow Mike platform -- was the lucky recipient of a phone interview with the Laird of Mar a Lago which aired this morning.  All went well as they discussed covid ("the China plague" now) and the amazing vaccines he personally created in record time, which should be a matter of "individual choice."  Of course he's fully vaccinated and had "absolutely no reverberation," which probably means no side effects.  Nothing new.  Then Inskeep asked, "Is it a disadvantage for Republicans to keep talking about the 2020 election in 2022?" opening the usual floodgate of recrimination about RINOs, Detroit ballots, the incompetence of his Arizona lawyer and how Biden never left "his basement" during the campaign.  It's incomprehensible to him that 80 million people voted against him (closer to 82 million); he's probably right that the record turnout would have been lower had Biden run against a halfway-normal human.  Still bitching about "the presidential rigged election of 2020," he hung up.  Someone else will have to call NPR "woke communists" on Twitter, probably "Liz Harrington."

At around the same time as the radio meltdown, Adam Gabbatt of the Guardian was limbering up his expense account for a visit to 45 Wine and Whiskey, the new bar in Trump Tower.  He confirms its boast of being "the most exclusive setting" for a booze-up, insofar as he was the sole customer in two attempts.  Maybe it's the sign at the entrance:  "New York City requires you to be vaccinated against Covid-19 to enter this business" might deter the most ardent Trumper.  Maybe it's the prices:  The Mar-a-Lago Spritzer of white wine, soda and grapefruit juice costs $29, while $45 gets you a whiskey with syrup and bitters, two small burgers and a diet Coke.  Maybe it's the decor, described as 1980s "dictator style" and featuring no less than 39 photos of 45 himself (some including Kim Jong-un and "an uninterested looking Queen Elizabeth").  At any rate, it's open 24 hours.  Midtown really comes alive around 4 am.  

Rep. Katherine Clark (D-MA), the assistant Speaker, has written to the House Sergeant-at-Arms with a suggestion for members who refuse to get vaccinated or wear a mask:  Stick them in an "isolation box" in the gallery surrounded by plexiglass.  This will give them something else to complain about when begging for contributions, or they can just stand on the front steps and scream like Empty Greene.  Oh, wait.

                                                                       Lock 'er up!

Air travel continues to get more interesting.  Monday the FAA ordered a brief ground stop of all West Coast airports after North Korea tested a missile.  Today in Honduras a man ran into the cockpit of an American Airlines flight bound for Miami, damaged the controls and attempted to jump out the window.  At this point, nobody knows why.

Sarah Beam of Houston is described by neighbors as "Best teacher ever" and "Teacher with a heart of gold," but there are no signs that proclaim her "Mother of the year."  She faces a child endangerment charge for locking her fourteen-year-old son in the trunk of her car because he tested positive for covid.  She was driving him to the testing center for confirmation when the police intervened.  I don't know what she had planned if he came up positive again.

Women are being systematically stripped of reproductive rights but it's all good -- they're getting all sorts of "attagirl" commemorations, mostly posthumous.  Maya Angelou is featured on the reverse of the new quarter, to be followed by Sally Ride and Anna May Wong, the first Chinese American movie star.  Meanwhile Mattel has announced a new Barbie doll of Ida B. Wells.  Nothing against the first three, two entertainers and an astronaut, but Wells was a journalist and leader of the anti-lynching movement who once had to flee Memphis to escape being lynched herself.  And as long as I'm complaining, how about Toni Morrison, the first African American to win the Nobel Prize for literature?  Marian Anderson, Althea Gibson, Wilma Rudolph, Barbara Jordan, Billie Holiday, Gwendolyn Brooks, Zora Neale Hurston, Mary Lou Williams, Shirley Chisholm, Jessye Norman, Hazel Scott?  How about Josephine Baker, who France just installed in its Pantheon?  Are we going to leave them all up to Mattel?

Speaking of posthumous honors, Emmett Till, whose 1955 murder sparked the civil rights movement, and his mother Mamie Till-Mobley, who forced white America to gaze at its work, may be honored with the Congressional Gold Medal.  The Senate bill was sponsored by Richard Burr (R-NC), who is retiring, and Cory Booker (D-NJ).  Rep. Bobby Rush's bill now has to pass the House.

The Herman Cain Award was established in imitation of the Darwin Awards for those who died of covid because they were so asking for it.  The first winner of 2022 is Texas Republican Kelly Canon, renowned for posts like "No jabby-jabby for me!  Praise GOD!"  "Gone too soon," commented her friends at the Arlington Republican Club.  Well...

Anthony Fauci has more important things to do than keep traipsing back to Capitol Hill to argue with idiot Republican Senators (sorry that's redundant).  He has decided not to hold back in the hope that they'll stop bothering him.  In the latest episode he was heard muttering "What a moron" after Roger Marshall (R-KS) demanded he provide "a financial disclosure" of his investments, information which has been in the public record since Fauci became head of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases.  "We'll continue to look for it," Marshall blustered.  "Where would we find it?"  It's almost as if he was really talking to the mouth-breathers back home.  Then Rand Paul (R-KY) resumed his vendetta, calling Fauci "juvenile" for accusing him of politicizing the pandemic and provoking death threats.  Funny thing is, both Paul and Marshall graduated from accredited medical schools; you'd think they would criticize Fauci with scientific data instead of ranting about "Big Tech giants" and dropping dark hints that he's cashing in.  Funnier thing:  Senator Jon Ossoff (D-GA) is readying a bill that would forbid members of Congress and their families from stock-trading while they hold office.  I guess he doesn't think Fauci's finances are the problem. comes Baby Tuckoo to stir up more feelings of victimization in his fans with an unaccountable story about some mythical Black man, possibly a Haitian, who is getting state-of-the-art covid treatment that "whites don't qualify for."  I wouldn't be surprised if he's related to Ronald Reagan's "welfare queen" driving her Escalade to the liquor store to spend her food stamps on vodka.

Speaking of medical emergencies, something is wrong with Mitch McConnell's eyes.  Yesterday President Biden and Vice President Harris went to Georgia on behalf of the John Lewis Voting Rights bill, stalled as usual by Manchin and Sinema.  Local groups stayed away but it was a humdinger:  "Do you want to be on the side of Dr. King or George Wallace?...John Lewis or Bull Connor?  Abraham Lincoln or Jefferson Davis?"  Mitch was appalled.   Groping his way to the Senate floor he said, "I did not recognize the man at the podium."  Find a real, board-certified ophthalmologist, Mitch.  Do not go to Rand Paul!  "The President's rant, rant yesterday was incoherent, incorrect and beneath his office."  Oh, and divisive.  Heavy on the divisive.  Not like a typical speech by his predecessor, who told NPR you're "a loser," Mitch.  Georgia Democrats, who have to live in "the belly of the beast," thought Biden didn't go far enough.  Fifty votes, that's what we need now.

Insurrectionist/political prisoner Jenna Ryan, the Texas realtor who rode a private jet to overthrow the government last year, was looking forward to a few weeks' incarceration under the impression she'd be working out and drinking smoothies (her goal:  lose thirty pounds).  Instead, she's suffering just like "the Jews in Germany" as other inmates mock the "white skin and blonde hair" she was counting on to keep her out of prison.  "They're calling me an insurrection Barbie...the epitome of a scapegoat...people who are Caucasian are being turned into evil in front of the media."  By spring she'll be free, visiting the Laura Ingraham Show to display the number tattooed on her arm and complain about the terrible food.  And she'll still be blonde and plugging her real estate business and negotiating for a book (I Have Paid) or a gig on Newsmax or a CPAC speech.  Hang in there, girl, what doesn't kill you makes you more oblivious.  Your friends have filed with the FEC under the name "Stop the Persecution of MAGA Blondies."  Now everyone knows where you live!  

Maybe they aren't your friends.




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