Thursday, February 04, 2021

The power of Trump compels you!

 I don't know if Joe Biden is getting enough exercise but he's setting a record for being exorcised.  The first Catholic president in 58 years belongs to a church that seems to be split between Papa Francesco and Charles Coughlin, with the latter half yearning for the second coming of the adulterous, lying rapist of Mar a Lago.  Go figure.

Even before the election Father Ed Meeks of Towson, Maryland, declared Biden the leader of "the party of death."  Last week Father John Zuhlsdorf lost his job in Wisconsin for conducting a live-streamed exorcism of so-called election fraud (because demons are "very good with electronic equipment" like voting machines).  Father David Fulton took part in the fascist coup attempt of January 6 (when he should have been back in Nebraska celebrating the Feast of the Epiphany) and explained that "the obvious steal" was triggered by "a demon called Baphomet."  Apparently the Knights Templar were involved.  This thing goes a lot deeper than even Qs believe.  (Similarities between the names Baphomet and Muhammad are all in your head, you paranoid radicaliberal.)  Fulton has been reprimanded by his bishop not for insurrection and criminal trespass but for impersonating an exorcist.  Apparently you have to get a credential.

Mostly their objections to Biden are the same as the Protestant fundamentalists' -- support for LGBTQ rights and reproductive freedom, and the wild-eyed socialism that calls for Americans to enjoy the same living wage and health care as people in the civilized countries.  But while the fundies embarrass themselves with prophecies that never quite come to pass, the Catholics prefer to embarrass themselves with holy water, Latin incantations and the promise of spinning heads, green vomit and other spectacles.  We all saw the movie.  To compete with the Q Shaman and the Jewish laser conspiracists, they need something new.  They need to get crazier.  Then the Catholic Church, like the Republican Party, will fragment faster, which is good for everyone.  

Good for Polish women, who are risking their health during a pandemic to protest the country's abortion ban.

Good for Ireland, seemingly stuck investigating an endless series of scandals involving the abuse of unmarried mothers, their children, and children in general at the hands of the Church.

Good for the priest-abused Catholics of England and Wales, sacrificed again to their church's reputation.

Good for US taxpayers, who involuntarily donated $3 billion to the Church through the Paycheck Protection Program last year.  Is it a religion or a business?

In conclusion, tax all the churches.  Especially this one.


Post a Comment

<< Home