Monday, August 17, 2020

Well, that's interesting

Dictator:  "We held elections and as long as you don't kill me, there won't be any other elections."

Belarusians:   "Fine, whatever it takes."

War, they say, is what teaches Americans geography.  Belarus, just west of actual Russia, was the heart of what Timothy Snyder has called the bloodlands, the part of Europe that saw the worst of mass killing between 1939 and 1945.  I don't think the grandchildren of the people who survived that are too bothered about one more death.  When you've lost the TV news stars and the factory workers, it might be time to get out of Minsk.

 You can't tell about families.  Edwin Booth was a highly esteemed actor.  William Patrick Hitler served in the US Navy during World War II.  For all I know, Robert Trump was a prince.  He raised a fine daughter.  It's certain he deserved a better tribute than he got from his older brother the galaxy-class narcissist:  "He was my biggest fan."  Big brother wants to hold his funeral in the White House because it's cheaper than Frank E. Campbell, especially if he can get the DoD to send over a coffin.

Another week, another quack covid cure:  Trump wants the FDA to hurry up and approve an extract of the toxic plant oleander because the ridiculous MyPillow guy has a lot invested in it.  Why should Kushner be the only one to monetize the Trumpandemic?  I just decided I don't care how many idiots destroy themselves by taking medical advice from a game-show bankrupt.  A votre sante!

If the Democrats plan to give one minute to Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and unlimited time to John Kasich, they have not been paying attention.  Why is this anti-choice Republican even on the program?  Just give his time to a series of Lincoln Project spots.  The time to be reach-across-the-aisle conciliatory is when Trump and his co-conspirators are awaiting trial.

It seems like only yesterday that Murdoch's New York Post was declaring New York in play.  Probably not so much now that Trump has re-tweeted (from some racist named Straka) "Leave Democrat [sic] cities.  Let them rot."  On a lighter note, there's fresh video of the First Escort refusing to hold hands with the Pussy Grabber as he totters down the steps of Air Force One.   If the DNC doesn't like my Lincoln Project suggestion, maybe a montage of all the times she has pulled away, accompanied by "I Wanna Hold Your Hand."  Work with me, Tom Perez.

Coronavirus cases are rising alarmingly from Italy to New Zealand.  It looks like the rest of the world is already on its second wave.  Come on, Yanks, don't let those foreigners creep up on you.  Tear the masks off old people and spit on them!  Pack the little ones off to school!  Hit the water parks and bars!  Play (every kind of) ball, and don't forget to crowd the churches!  Half a million dead by Labor Day sounds like a lot, but we used to build a Liberty Ship every twenty-four hours.

We still don't know the name of the bareassed Berliner who chased a wild boar to retrieve his laptop, but we know the boar's name is Elsa.  She and the shoats are a regular attraction of the park, where they enjoy visitors' food.  "They phlegmatically forage in broad daylight," said Katja Kammer of the Grunewald district forestry office.  Excellent use of "phlegmatically," but why do you have to kill them?  Man got his computer back and we all enjoyed the show.  "Withdrawn as a matter of priority" is a terrible euphemism.  Save Elsa and her babies.

And by the way, more Germans:

It says they're protesting the commercialization of football.  Maybe this could replace taking a knee?


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