Monday, March 02, 2020

Well, that was easy

The Buttermilk Sky Organization announces the retirement of Chris Matthews from MSNBC.  We now call upon Bill Barr to decide he wants to spend more time with his bagpipes.  Matthews can go to work for the Senate campaign of Joseph Kennedy VI or whatever he is.

Trump will never quit because he would face too many criminal charges with nowhere to hide.  If you remember that he wanted to employ couriers instead of email (which he still doesn't understand) and equip twenty-first-century aircraft carriers with steam-powered launchers, you won't be surprised when his campaign blimp lumbers into view over your town.  Hindenburg II was a gift from -- well, take a  guess.

I think I've already admitted I stopped paying close attention to the new music when Talking Heads broke up (wasn't David Byrne awesome on SNL?) so I may have the details wrong, but evidently Public Enemy has fractured over the Bernie Sanders campaign.  Joe Biden says he'll bring America together the way it was for a couple of weeks around 1945, but Bernie's like some old, grouchy Yoko Ono.

That Kenny Cooch, he screw-a da pooch.  (How many chances do I get for a Louie Prima reference?)  A federal judge says Ken Cuccinelli's appointment to run the US Citizenship and Immigration Services was illegal, and so are his new rules against asylum seekers.  So much winning.

Tomorrow, March 3, is the birthday of Thomas Jefferson, but in his city of Charlottesville it has been re-named Liberation and Freedom Day, commemorating the arrival of Union troops in 1865.  Of course there are complaints that Jefferson is being "expunged" from history, but he still has the large monument in Washington and the nickel, among others.  I promise to remember him.

On any day of the year, this is just wrong.


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