Tuesday, January 30, 2018

Are you ready for some covfefe?

As the minutes tick down -- literally, CNN has one of those idiot countdown clocks on the screen -- the crazy accelerates.

LOCK 'IM UP!  According to fellow crewmen, President Queeg continues to ricochet between the childish hope that Robert Mueller will hand him a lollipop and a "no collusion" clean bill of health, and snarling rage at the likelihood of further indictments and guilty pleas.  "Sources" (take that as you please) say he will order Three-Fifths-of-a-Man Sessions to find some pretext for charging Mueller with bigly crimes of one kind or another, since he doesn't have anything like the guts to fire him.  For decades Trump ran his skeevy businesses on a foundation of lawsuits, real and threatened, and now he imagines he can make "my guys" in the Department of Justice indict people just as easily.  Criminal charges, however, require evidence, and that could be scarce with most of the FBI willing to see him drawn and quartered first.  We are fortunate that Trump is too stupid to keep from stepping on his own rake.

"'CAUSE I'M A DENTIST...AND A DISGRACE!"  A number of Congress members are bringing guests to the State Opening of Parliament of the Uniom tonight, undocumented aliens whose fate hangs in the balance of Trump's senile whims.  And Rep. Paul Gosar, (R-AZ), DDS, is pissed.  He wants them arrested for being all illegal in the royal presence.   (Really.  His Twitter account admits he's a dentist.)  Unlike the very fine people who threaten to kill reporters, they're apparently dangerous and probably terrorists.  Rep. Emanuel Cleaver II (D-MO), on the other hand, is not doing the plus-one, as he says he wouldn't "subject" a guest to it.  Lots of no-shows, too, may want to  line up some seat-fillers so it doesn't look as sad as the inauguration.

"TRUMP IS OURS AGAIN!"  A Russian anchor on a Russian news program on Russian television actually said that after Trump refused to enforce the newest sanctions on Russia passed by Congress.  Say this for them, they're not subtle.  Why should they be?  A day earlier, Putin's principal opponent in the March "election," Alexei Navalny, was lock-him-up'ed on a Moscow street.  And poor Donny could only look on and wait for the day ( assuming Fox covered it).  He's been heard musing that another 9/11-type attack could bring him the popularity -- and dictatorial power -- he craves.  (I keep hearing Angela Lansbury plotting the presidential nominee's murder in The Manchurian Candidate.)

STIR CRAZY?  I'm no expert at this computer stuff, it's all I can do to copy and paste a picture, but I don't run a Rightzi website.  A woman in Texas created a fake Sean Hannity account and quickly snagged a big, pale fish -- Julian Assange, promising Sean dirt on Sen. Mark Warner, ranking Democrat on the Intelligence Committee.  Is his face red!  Well, vaguely pinkish.    I think the perfidious albino needs some Vitamin D.  The Texas lady would be a late contender for Nasty Woman of the Month, had we not already decided on...

NANCY SPECTOR, chief curator of the Guggenheim Museum in New York City.  She did it with wit, panache, and a solid-gold toilet.  Now, if I did it right, here she is:

Image result for nancy spector



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